Big City Girl, Small Town Teacher

Me and my Twindom

2007-08-25T13:01:00.000-07:00

Me (on the left) and my twin brother as babies

When I return to my hometown, my mom informed me of this article. It claims that the girl in a set of boy-girl fraternal twins (because boy-girl twins are always fraternal ... I’m sick of answering that question) is 25% less likely to have children and 15% less likely to get married. It continues to say that this could be because of the girl receiving more testosterone in the womb, which can result in things like longer fingers and more masculine facial features.

Dammit! As if I don’t have enough working against me to find a date! I don’t think I have particularly long fingers nor masculine facial features. And I thought testosterone in women was what helps leads to arousal. So should I just be walking around horny all the time? Well... haha!

New teachers and a wedding

2007-08-24T17:45:00.000-07:00

Wedding news first. Went to my first wedding here. It wasn't "traditional" but it was nice. One of the bridesmaids use to teach here and she needed a place to stay, so she crashed at my place. She was super sweet and I was so glad I could help her out. She was my “in” for the actually wedding ceremony. The wedding was suppose to start at 3, so I showed up at 2:30 to get a seat. Well, I ran into two of the local singers (friends of my crush) on my way and I sat with them for a while. But they then had to sing. Luckily, one of the teachers I know was there so I hung out with her. Anyway, the ceremony was super late and started at 4:30!

The ceremony was nice, a simple civic ceremony. Then all the wedding guests pile into vehicles and does a honking tour of town. Everyone comes out of their houses and waves at the giant motorcade.

I went to my co-workers house afterward, we had a few beers and then went to the reception. We stayed until the bride and groom came and then went back to my co-workers house for more beer. Then we went back to the reception for the end of it, then headed over to the next island for more partying.

I had a lot of fun. I flirted a little tiny bit with a guy there, had another guy buy me drinks and then a creepy guy hit on me (that wasn’t fun though). Anyway, the guy who was buying me drinks is a buddy of my crush (one of the singers), he was the friend that my crush brought to my birthday party in June. I think he was hitting on me a little. Hmmm.

On the way back was the bad part. It’s over folks. The buddy told me my crush was seeing someone. I was crushed, but not at all surprised. In my drunkeness though, I did bitch about it all the way from the dock to my house with my houseguest (I think the word I said the most was fuck). Sober, I’m still disappointed but what can I do. Get over it! When I see my crush (my ex-crush now?) I’m gonna let him know I know, in a good-natured way of course, so that it won’t be so awkward! When I talked to him at the potlatch, he was really awkward.

Anyway, we’re getting seven new teachers this year. The turn-over is never this big – it’s just that some people had to finally move on. We lost two veteran teachers last year and only one newby so not too bad. Anyway, I’ve spent the last two days visiting 4 of the new teachers. They’re all really nice. Only one is my age ... and he happens to be from my hometown (or so I hear). Plus, when I left in June we were told about the new teachers and how the men all have partners. Well, the hometown newby is here by himself and he’s single. Hmmmm....

New Items

2007-08-22T10:32:00.000-07:00

It's been a few days and I meant to blog on Monday, but I've been really busy, and I mean it! We had a two day potlatch, Monday an Yesterday, and when they say two days, they mean two days! Both days were 12 hours in the hall... that's lots! Here are some photos. Just a disclaimer, I'm not too great on action shots with bad lighting so these were the only "publish worthy" shots.

This is a shot of a humming bird mask.Usually I've seen this dance done with four masks, but this time only two were used.

The other mask ... I think it is a loon. This is also my student's favorite dance ... maybe because one of her brothers carved the mask and her other brother dances in the mask!

My dinner plate on day two. I ate all my fish too!!

I sat with one of my students and her mom and aunt. They were awesome to sit with, we laughed a lot. My student was suppose to get adopted, but they ran out of time and she was really disappointed. I feel really bad about that :(
'm quite tired and I need to prepare for a wedding so I'll probably comment more on the potlatch later.

FYI: Said hi to my crush. I think he's super shy. Anyway, I asked him if he received my letter. He didn't. Fuck! I didn't have his mailbox number, only his street address, but I guess they couldn't figure that out at the post office. And I didn't get it back as not sent. What complicates matters more, is that there is another guy in town with the exact same name ... except he's 18. I hope to god he didn't get it, that would just all the more awkward. But it's funny all the same!!

Blog as Therapy

2007-08-18T18:45:00.001-07:00

Ok, to give my readers a voyeuristic view into my non-existent love life, I mentioned in an earlier entry that “my personal life is looking very much up” (nice English, I must say). Well, it’s now in the pits again. Let me explain it all, and then send me comments.

So, as I mentioned in a couple of entries, I have (had? can’t make up my mind yet) a crush on this guy. Well, it started with me just batting my eyelashes when ever I ran into him in town, and making sly banter. He always seemed pleased to see me when ever we saw each other.

Then at the beginning of June, I had to go on a mini-break ( I need to get off the island before I went crazy) so I hopped on the ferry for a 10-hour ferry trip to the nearest “city” for a weekend. On the way back (another 10 hour overnight voyage), my crush was on the ferry. I made him sit with me, and he talked to me for hours telling me stories of his trip to France last year, local legends and his daughter (who is half our age .... hmm). It was all very nice. The night ended with me going “to bed” on a reclining chair. When I woke up the next morning, he was sleeping behind me on the floor all curled up in a ball. I was awake, so I took my blanket and draped it over him. He mumbled to me that I was sweet for taking care of him, and went back to sleep. When we arrived back home, I gave him my number.

People had seen us on the ferry hanging out, so the next week I got harassed by various community members about him (a kid screaming across the playground that she knew I was dating her uncle, an elder in the school pointing out to me that she is his ‘Nan, some stranger in the store asking me where my fella was, etc).

And he didn’t call ... and I was disappointed. Except he did call!!! My stupid, $#%*ing internet is a giant piece of $h!t and sometimes I’m so desperate to get online, I use dial-up. The one time I used it, he happened to call. How do I know? Because the next time he called (when I wasn’t home, grrr), 2 weeks later, he mentioned (on my machine) that the last time he called, my phone just rang and rang (where my answering machine would pick up when I’m not home).

Anyway, I called him back to invite him to my birthday party, which, by the way, was a bit of a bomb because the guy I was throwing it with did some stupid shit the week before so a lot of my friends didn’t feel comfortable coming to our party. Anyway, my crush came to the “party” and I think we really hit it off. We have a lot of similar values, etc. The best part was when he asked if he could be my date to grad (Grade 12 grad here is really big). I was excited about that. And I was totally stoked that he gave me a giant hug and kissed my cheek as he was leaving at 3 in the morning!

The things started to go down hill. We arranged to meet at my house and we’d go to grad together. He was late, like 15 minutes late. I had to get going to help out, so I left and put a note on my door. He showed up to the hall, like half an hour later than when I arrived there and didn’t mention being late or getting my note. I looked hot and he didn’t compliment me either. Hmmf!

So it was kinda boring, he tried to spice it up by telling me how the grads were related to various community members. He even told me some colorful stories of his grad ceremony. Anyway, we sat at one of the teacher’s tables (because I’m a teacher after all) and being such, we got the short end of the stick in the food department as the catering ran out of food. So we got more of a snack then a meal. So halfway through the ceremony, my crush leans over and tells me he’s going to get some food. An hour later, he comes back. He’d gone to the restaurant and had pizza with some friends of his. That’s just a bit weird to me! So grad ends and there was gonna be a dance an hour later. I don’t know if I really want to go and he says he’s going to go and I should too and save him a dance. So I do and he never shows.

So the next day, I call and leave a message that he should call me before I leave in a week for vacation. He doesn’t call. I was a bit disappointed. So like 5 days later, my co-worker who’s leaving the community wants to see the memorial pole that my crush is carving but doesn’t know where it is. I end up taking my co-worker. So I mention to my crush, again, that I’d love to chat before I leave. He mentions that he meant to call me all this time, but he’s been to busy. Hmm, to me, that’s guy code that he’s just not that into me. I mean, come on, it takes like 2 minutes to pick up the phone and wish me a good vacation.

So that night, I end up going to dinner with a bunch of co-workers and they kinda bring it up all sly like, since they saw us at grad together and have heard the local gossip. I told them that it is going nowhere since he’s told me he’s “too busy to call” and that I hadn’t really talked to him since grad. They then try to convince me that things are different here and the fact that he was seen at such an event with him meant he really liked me. Meanwhile, all my city friends are telling me to forget about him, and that I deserve to be pursued and should not give him another thought unless he’s willing to win me.

Now, I’m super confused because I’ve never really dated dated before. Sure, I went out with my first boyfriend for almost 3 years, then asshole for another 5, then Brilliant, but those were different. The first two were more than happy to go out with me without much effort and I didn’t even like Brilliant before we hooked up.

So. my last night in town rolls around, and I end up getting drunk and going to the local bar with some co-workers where I drink even more. I’m very well behaved drunk, I just shut down so that I stay well behaved. Anyway, guess who shows at the bar? My crush of course!!! I ended up chatting with him and then I sat at his table and we were chatting and holding hands. At one point he told me that he finds it hard to talk about matter of the heart but that he thinks I’m a beautiful person. Awww ... right?!?

So he ends up walking me home (which was me inadvertently taking off without my friends ... opps!). EVERYONE from the bar saw this happen and we got quite a few catcalls as we turned up my street. But he was a gentleman and we hugged a bunch on my door step and we shared a couple of check kisses and one lip peck (wow, can I give every little detail?!?). He asked me to call him over the summer. I said I would (I agree to almost anything when I’m drunk). I paid for that night by barfing all the next day and then flying on three planes to my sister’s house (and combining the two activities together).

So after two weeks or so of vacation, now super duper confused about the whole thing, I decided that I would not call since he was away working at camp all summer and would only be home for like 24 hours every weekend. Instead, I wrote a witty letter about my vacation so far and told him 4 different ways he could get a hold of me over the summer, if he wanted to. And he never did.

So now, I’m at home reflecting about the whole thing. Today is the day he gets home from camp permanently. He knows I’m home because I mentioned it in the letter and I’ve already ran into the majority of his family since I’ve been back. So my question to you is: What should I do if he finally decides to call?

I'm back!!!

2007-08-16T20:05:00.000-07:00

I back to the small town and to blogging. Man, what a great summer I’ve had so far. I’ll be blogging all about it in the coming days, so stay tuned. Look forward to my tails about washing machines, twins, elevators, the M-hearse, All-you-can-eat, dentists, and vacations.
It’s great being back home, yet a little strange. It always takes me a few days to adjust when I’ve been gone for so long. It’s like when I’d go away for the summer to visit my dad when I was a kid and then I’d return to my room. It would look like my room, but somehow it had changed without my presence there. All I can say is that I love being back in my own bed ... as much as it was to sleep in my sister’s nursery on the floor! While I was gone, I had a friend staying at my place. She was moving out of her place here and wanted to stick around for a few extra days. Well, she left me some miscellaneous food goods that she didn’t want to move with her like a giant bottle of Bombay Saphire Gin!

I’ve only been out in town a few times, but several people have stopped me to welcome me back. It excites me a bit that people I don’t even know (I feel a bit bad that I should know them) tell me, “Welcome home!” not just welcome me back, but back home.

The Guilt Moves on

2007-07-20T17:05:00.000-07:00

Ok, I'm the worse blogger ever! I'm on vacation and I won't be blogging until I return to the Small Town (August 15th). Look forward to some interesting observations about the city and teaching and more obsessiveness.

2 Weeks Left

2007-06-03T11:08:00.000-07:00

My god! I only have two weeks worth of classes ... of course there is the week of final exams after that and a week of classroom clean-up, administration days (ie. staff meetings) and a pro-d day (which is bizarre because we all know a pro-d day is an excuse to have a day free of kids. They don't have the same merit when the kids aren't there).
School wise, my two government examinable courses are being crammed with information to get them ready. My other math class is studying already for their exam. I'm worried that some kids will not pass this reporting term ... and if they do crappy on their final exam, they won't pass the course. I can't help but feel responsible for that, in a way. But in all fairness, the student can always write make-up tests for me, but most of them have not taken me up on that opportunity.
So much has happened in the last little while but I know it will take forever to blog about it. I've been terrible about getting things posted. Oh well. Here are some highlights.
• Went on an awesome pro-d day traveling around the territory by boat. We saw some old village sites that date back 2500 years ago. Of course, only forest is left but a local archaeologist told us what to look for to identify other village sites. We also got to see some cool wall paintings.
• I have a harsh addiction to Facebook ... or as all my friends call it, Crackbook.
• The personal life is looking very much up. The only draw back is that I'm leaving at the end of June for two months so just as things are starting to take off, they will come to a screeching halt.
• I finally made it to the local bar. It wasn't that bad ... no weirdos hitting on me, but supposedly it gets super busy during the last half hour and I left then.
• Looking forward to going to the hometown and the big city for two months. My official plans are to sleep on various family member's couches and go to the beach and do absolutely nothing. Sweet!
• My sister had her baby! He was born a month early, on May 27th. He was only 5lb, 4 oz. when he was born. Tiny! My mom and my sister say he was about my size. Ahh! His name happens to be the last three letters of my first name, so I'm totally stoked he was named partial after me.
• The community had The Children's Cultural Celebration. It's a play pot latch. It was so awesome! I got to dance in a couple dances! I even went to some singing practices to try to learn some of the songs. But I really only learned the title and chorus to one song because trying to learn to read the language, pronounce all the new sounds, learn a tune, and drum at the same time cannot be learned in a week, Oh well, I had a blast anyway!

Ok, that's all for now.

M'eh

2007-05-20T13:19:00.000-07:00

It's been a while. I say that a lot lately. I keep thinking I don't blog because I'm lazy. But I'm not! It's that I'm busy and don't have the energy to come up with something ammusing ... or I don't feel like typing. It's just one more thing I feel slightly guilty about.

So, I stole this idea from Tocatta's blog.

You are The Lovers

Motive, power, and action, arising from Inspiration and Impulse.

The Lovers represents intuition and inspiration. Very often a choice needs to be made.

Originally, this card was called just LOVE. And that's actually more apt than "Lovers." Love follows in this sequence of growth and maturity. And, coming after the Emperor, who is about control, it is a radical change in perspective. LOVE is a force that makes you choose and decide for reasons you often can't understand; it makes you surrender control to a higher power. And that is what this card is all about. Finding something or someone who is so much a part of yourself, so perfectly attuned to you and you to them, that you cannot, dare not resist. This card indicates that the you have or will come across a person, career, challenge or thing that you will fall in love with. You will know instinctively that you must have this, even if it means diverging from your chosen path. No matter the difficulties, without it you will never be complete.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Crazy about it ... it asked me a question and I chose that I'm immature and silly. This thing says something about maturity. Haha! And the choices of cards are all fantasy like ... I guess being tarot ... that stems from fantasy. So cat people won out!

New Schedule

2007-05-06T10:15:00.000-07:00

Sigh of giant relief. My last HCE class is over. I never have to teach that course again (knock on wood). It's not that I didn't like the students, they were interesting and it was an excellent way for me to get to know all the grade 8s and 9s, it's just that the curriculum was difficult to teach in a fun way without the use of a computer lab.

Oh, I didn't plan on talking about the computer lab situation, but I think I will. I think HCE is a course better designed for the kids to do research and present what they learned or do a little project. The problem is that the high school only has one computer lab. And during HCE, there was always an Information Technology class in there. So we didn't have that resource available. Which, in this day and age, makes things difficult. For instance, some of my kids have IEPs (Individual education plans) that say they are more successful if they can type they're work instead of hand write it (why they don't have their own lap top is another issue). Also, sometimes I want to use a Powerpoint presentation to "spice" things up. Well, the school does have a portable digital projector with lap top that I used quite a bit.

Anyway, I'm glad that class is over. Between egg baby fiascoes, teaching STDs, and other crazy stories, I had a huge learning curve from this class. I guess that's not such a bad thing, but that class was always the hump I had to get over everyday.

So now that I don't teach HCE anymore, I get an extra prep during that period. But I will be using that time to be a self appointed hall monitor (to earn some authoritarian points with the kids) and I will be used as a substitute teacher for absent teachers.

I've also gotten my tentative schedule for next year. It looks like I'll be teaching literacy, math 9, 10, and 11 (11 may be a half year 11, half year 12 class ... we'll see how the students will react to that) and then drama 12!!! I'm totally excited about that one! When I was planning on being a teacher in high school, I always wanted to be a math and drama teacher. But the community college I went to, didn't offer drama classes so I dropped the drama teacher bit. I took one drama class is university, and then I took a "how to teach drama class" last summer as part of my course work. And since the drama club has been quite a success this year, I'm being given a drama class.

I know there will be challenges with that one because I will most likely get students scheduled in that class who didn't want to take it. But I have all summer to think about what I'm going to do.

She Just Wouldn't Leave!!!

2007-05-03T18:33:00.000-07:00

As I was writing yesterday's rant I had a very unexpected visitor. I heard a voice say "hello" at the bottom of the stairs. So I ran down the hall (like I always do) and I see this small head peep around the wall and ask to use my bathroom.

I recognize the kid as one that goes to my school (as all kids around here do, duh). I was a bit hesitant because my house was a mess and I didn't want some strange kid in my bathroom. Plus, safety issues about being alone with a student in my house. Where were her parents?

I said she could and I continued blogging away. When she was finished, she came out and started talking to me. To be polite, I asked her what she had been doing and if she was having fun, etc. i was just being polite. She of course, decided she wanted to hang out and came over to my computer and started reading my volleyball rant. Before I could minimize the window (I'm on an iMac so i can't just turn the monitor off) she saw the part where I say, "It fucking hurts" (Hmm, another indication I should stop swearing?).

She gasped and was a bit shocked that I had typed the F word in my work. I was embarrassed. Ok, she had her jollies so I told her I had a lot of work to do and she need to go back outside to play. She was having none of that.

Fuck. How do I get rid of this kid without being mean? She then started opening my computer desk drawer, pulled out two of my Sharpie markers and told me she had some things to write on with the markers outside.

Oh no, she was not walking with my markers! So I asked her to put them back. Instead she put them in her pocket. Crap! Ok, I calmly and nicely asked her to put them back and it was time for her to leave because I am very busy and need to get back to work. She said no.

She asked me who lives below me. I told her. She then began to tell me that no, that person lived nextdoor. Ok, this was getting old fast. I'm pretty sure I recognized the kid as being in the class of the person who lives under me. I asked the kid what grade she was in. She told me 2. Ok, that means she was either in the class of my downstairs neighbour or of a teacher down the street. I took the gamble and told her I was going to call her teacher if she didn't leave.

She looked at me like she thought I wasn't going to. She was calling my bluff. So I went to get the phone (which is in the room closest to the stairs). The kid followed. As I showed her her teacher's phone number in the phone she started slinking down the stairs. As I pressed the button to call her teacher she was almost to the bottom, but not leaving.

I asked my co-worker for help. I explained that her student asked to use my bathroom which I allowed her to do and then she took advantage of my hospitality and tried to walk with my pens and wouldn't leave. I put the girl on with her teacher and her teacher explained that it wasn't polite to stay when someone wants you to leave. The girl made like she was going to leave and we said our good-byes over the phone.

The kid still would not leave.

So I took her shoes and jacket outside and said I was going to leave them out there. I was feeling super bad now. So I did go outside and she came out to investigate. As she was standing half out my front door I realized she could just go inside my place, lock the door and I would be stuck outside while she did god knows what in my house. Good things she didn't! I came back in and kinda barricaded the stairs up to my place so she was stuck in the front hall.

She knew it was only a matter of time until I did my next move. I didn't want to do anything drastic like physically pick her and her shoes up and deposit the whole thing outside, but I was thinking I may need to. She then "bargained" with me that if she left, would she be able to come over tomorrow (today) and hang out? Ok, I was cool with that.

She asked me if I was lying. I would never lie to a student. And I wasn't.

I'm just hoping she forgets. Or if not, I'm wondering if it's wrong that I lock my door and not answer it when she comes a-knocking?

I called her teacher to thank her for the help. She gave me a bit of background on the kid. The girl was close with the teacher that lived in my place last year. The kid's parents are a bit neglectful too. They don't care what she does, as long as she's home before dark ... or she needs to pick a place where they can pick her up before then. She's also had problems with lice infestations for the last couple years. Remember, that this kid is only 8.

I feel a little sorry for her. But, I don't really want to be her new "big buddy" either. Cold of me ... maybe. But I don't want to be caught up in this sort of thing. But it's probably too late. This is why I teach high school. I'm not strong enough to deal with issues like this. I'm better at arming teenagers with how they can help themselves and I'm just better with helping teenagers and stepping up to bat for them. Little kids are tough because they need adults to look out for them.

Volleyball

2007-05-02T16:12:00.000-07:00

Ok, more bitching (a theme of the week perhaps?) but what is with volleyball. I don't get it. I hate the sport. You wanna know why?

Because it's fucking painful ... that's why!

Here is a picture of my arm a week after I played. You see the fading bruises? They were worse, I'll tell you that!

I just don't get a sport where the object it to hit the ball with a very sensitive part of your body over a high net over and over again. And "they" try to disguise the pain of the sport by calling it volleyball. That's the least painful way to get the ball over the net ... the volley... unless you do it wrong and you bend your fingers back and sprain them!

But volleying's not always a viable option. Bumping the ball is the other move. And this is what fucking hurts. If the sport were called bumpball, this may remind people of the pain and the would opt out of plying.

The serve and spike are also painful ... where you hit the ball with that kooshy part of your palm by your thumb. Because that feels good.

The sport should be called painball, dammit!

So why was I playing this sport-where-people-voluntary-hurt-themselves? Tuesday nights are staff night in the school gym and the staff haven't been making use of this time so the PE teacher wanted to encourage the staff to use the gym time. So he scheduled a staff vs. Grade 12 volleyball game. I like encouraging the students to be active and I like to be active too so I played.

I remember volleyball being painful when I played in junior high but I thought I was tougher now then I was then. Obviously not! The worst part was the ball was over inflated so it hurt like a mo-fo and we couldn't let the air out because of the way the pump was made with the built-in needle. And of course, we only have one ball in teh entire school. Grrr!

I'm hoping next week we play a sport where we only "accidentally" get injured ... like soccer or hockey.

5 questions

2007-05-01T16:27:00.000-07:00

To continue with what others have been doing like Tocatta and Kelly, here are my interview questions from Tocatta. The funny thing is that Tocatta has a math degree but has troubles counting. I'll answer all her questions anyway.

1. As a first year teacher is there anything you wish you had learned at university that would have made teaching easier?

That's a good one. When I was a kid, I always thought you'd learn how to print nicely in teacher college. They don't teach you that. I also have no idea how to teach a kid to read ... not that a high school math teacher necessarily needs that skill, but I thought I'd get taught that at some point.

I'm trying to think of my biggest problems as a teacher and what I wish I had been taught to deal with them. I have had some problems with discipline but that comes from the kids testing me and my philosophy, not from my lack of good method. My other problem is trying to fit the kids to the mold of the course. I have to make a lot of my own resources because I don't have access to many and the ones I do have, don't always fit my students.

Honestly, what they did arm me with (a lot of bullshitting adults and diplomacy) has helped me a lot in dealing with the adults in the system.

But to answer the question seriously ... I can't think of anything. All the hard lessons I've learned this year, have been just getting use to teaching. I think I was warned about a lot of them.

3. You come from a pretty large center and now you are living in a very small isolated community. What is the one thing that came as a pleasant surprise about living in a small town?

The people are so nice. I'm going to comment on living in a native community too. I hate to say it, but my views of native reserves weren't all too great before I moved here. You hear all about the bullshit stereotypes of drinking problems and parents that beat their kids, etc. Of course, stuff like that happens here (like in every community) but I don't see it more than I did in the city. That's fantastic. My ugly discrimination has changed. Which is a gift that is truly priceless.

I love walking down the street and having everyone wave at me ... even if they don't know me (I do know that some of them may know who I am but I don't know them).

2. If you could hop on a plane right this minute where would you go and what would you do?

I don't know if I should answer that honestly because part of it makes me look bad. But, I'm going to. Seriously, I'd go either to my hometown or the big city to go shopping and to hang out with friends and family ... and to pick up a guy. Terrible, I know.

But if I had that option, I wouldn't want to go somewhere exotic by myself. Plus, I don't have a passport. If I had the option to take a friend and I had a passport and lots of money, I'd go to Hawaii and sit on the beach all day.

3. What historical event would you undo or rewrite if you could?

Wow, so hard to say because there are so many that caused so much pain and misery. But, they also changed the world, and some for the better ?!? Like, if I said I wish the Holocaust (and WWII) didn't happen, where would we be with nuclear weapons? What kind of nations would the US and Britain be?

I guess since I lived through the following, I wish it had never happened: 9-11. A lot of good people died for no good reason. I didn't know anyone who died, but I'll never forget the sureal-ness of watching the 2nd tower go down live on TV. I still can't watch any of the movies because they will upset me.

I think Bush's reign would also be a lot different and the War on Iraq would have been a lot different if 9-11 hadn't happened. But 9-11 did open my eyes more to the fact that the rest of the world may not be willing to put up with the US's bullshit anymore. Just a thought.

4. If you could have the quality of a superhero. What quality would you want to possess? Would you use it for good or evil or both?

I would want to be able to read people's minds. But, I'd want the ability to turn it off too when I'd need too. I'd use it to benefit me, mostly, so is that good or evil?

If I were given the ability right now, I'd still be a math teacher. I'd just be the best one because then I could know what the kids are thinking so I'd be able to help them better. I think it would be so much easier to find a date too. Keeping one would be the problem :)

I wouldn't let too many people know or the government would want to use it for political negotiations, and then I think I'd die of boredom :)

5. If you could be a contestant on any of the reality t.v. shows which one would you want to be on and you have a strategy picked out for trying to win?

Easy. Survivor. When the show first came on, I was in love with it. I was obsessive with it (I have books and CDs and the game). In fact, I would have applied but you have to be a US citizen AND resident. I was going to get my citizenship (both my parents were born in the US, and my mom is still a citizen) to apply, but I wasn't going to live down there! Plus, the paper work is a giant pain in the ass.

If Survivor were offered to Canadians, I would sooo apply. I've thought of many strategies. One I had for a while, was to tell everyone I was a clerk at a photocopy shop (which has been my only real job besides teaching) but I wouldn't tell them I was a math teacher or that I went to university. Then they wouldn't think I'm as smart as I am .. which I think would help. I also realized I would ALWAYS be nice (but not too much to be annoying), never try to be the leader, and never complain.

It's funny you ask that question because I'm working on a blog entry where I compare student teaching to being on a reality TV show. You get judged two to three times a week, some people get "kicked off the island", some people quit, and there is always drama.

***************************************************

I think if I thought about the questions for a week, I could give better answers. But I don't have a week to formulate perfect answers. Ok, so here's what's next:

If anyone would like to be interviewed ....

• Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me!"
• I will respond by e-mailing you five questions. I get to pick them, and you have to answer them all.
• You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
• You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
• When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Knicky Knicky Nine Door

2007-04-30T15:00:00.000-07:00

To keep with the theme of things that piss me off, I'm going to rant about something that drives me nuts.

Some of the neighbourhood kids think it's fun to ring my doorbell and run away. This is annoying. They can kinda get away with it because my place's front door is the closest to the road and I don't have a rail in front of my ramp (which acts as my front staircase. Ask me about the ramp if you're curious). I find it especially annoying because it takes me a while to get to the door. I usually sit at my computer and it is as far as possible from the front door. My computer is in front of a giant picture window in my living room. With a view like this, can you blame me for spending a lot of time here?

When the doorbell rings, I usually run because if I walk it takes me 25 seconds to get from my computer seat to the door. That is not counting any stops to turn on the lights, or to stop what I'm doing or to put down the math textbooks I usually have in my lap. I have to go down the long hallway ...

... and then down the loonng staircase.

The last time I ran for a "nine door", I slipped on my way down the stairs. Yeah, I know my fault for running down stairs. But it pissed me off that no one was there. Usually I go out the door and look down the street to see kids running off. I told a couple of co-workers and they told me who the kids were and where they lived.

Well, the next time after the slip-on-the-stairs, I was really pissed. I was in a good brain space with my work and I was ticked that I had to get up for nothing and lose my train of thought. So I put on some slip-ons and marched out the door into the rain to see the same #*%$ing kids strolling down the street. I yelled my loudest,

"DO YOU KNOW IT'S RUDE TO RING SOMEONE'S BELL AND NOT STAY FOR THEM TO ANSWER IT?!?!!!"

The kids kind of stooped like they knew they were caught. I was pissed so I kept yelling ...

"IF YOU DO IT AGAIN, I'M GOING TO FOLLOW YOU HOME AND TELL YOUR PARENTS!!!!"

They started running down the street. I just stood there. I saw them run toward the house that my co-workers said they lived in and the kids turned around and saw me standing there so they kinda veered onto the street and just hung out on the road lolling about and glimpsing at me. I guess they thought they were being clever that I couldn't figure out where they lived if they didn't go to the door of their house.

I just stood there with my hands on my hips (to show them my pissed body language) and watched them. In the pouring rain. For about 3 minutes. The kids were obviously scared to go home and have me see them go. After I was nice and wet, I finally went inside.

They haven't rung my bell since.

Egg Baby Mishap

2007-04-29T16:40:00.000-07:00

So I had my first "major" problem with a class. It left me shaking after the kids were gone.

In my HCE class (Health and Career Education) we have a week where the kids are given an egg (that I've blown the insides out of ... insert joke here) to take care of. We spend a whole class building it a little home and naming it, etc. This project is worth 10% of the kid's mark. All they have to do is fill-in-the blanks on a template that works as a daily journal and have their parents sign the log daily that says the kid brought the egg home with them everyday. I also understand accidents happen so if the kid broke the egg or lost it, they had to write me a 250-word letter about what happened and what they learned to earn their 10%. No biggie.

Day three comes around and we have some drama. One girl leaves class to go to the washroom and comes back and her egg is gone. Someone in class has taken it. I casually tell the kids that whoever has it needs to give it back because the joke is over and it's really not that funny.

So we finish the lesson 10 minutes before the bell and I give the kids some free time. I also tell them that they can go for lunch early it the class is clean and the egg has been returned. The class get tidied up but no egg.

I mention to the kids, again, to give back the egg and they all can go. Most of the kids are playing cards and working on the lap top in the class but some kids are itching to go early. These kids are like, ok, give back the egg. Still no egg.

The bell rings. I am now barricading the door so the kids can't get out. I'm a bit upset that someone took the kid's egg and is not giving it back. Plus, I'm pretty hungry and want my lunch. Some of the kids are trying to get past me and telling me that it's bull that they have to stay when they didn't take the egg. I tell them that someone in the class has the egg and needs to give it back.

The kids then start trying to say that they'll give their egg to the kid that's missing the egg or that she can just write the letter to get marks. I point out that that is not the point. Someone has taken someone else's property and is not giving it back. That is called stealing and I won't tolerate it in my class.

The kids are now getting pissed that they can't for lunch. Some of the kids make small attempts to push past me but they can see I'm pretty mad. They start saying stuff like, "Well, it's her fault that she didn't take care of her egg. She needs to have it with her at all times." And "It's just a stupid egg anyway."

That is not the point!!! Some kid stole something from someone else. I don't care if it was an egg. No one steals in my classroom.

The kids keep up with the arguments and I'm getting genuinely mad, which I never do. I agreed with them that it was a stupid egg and I don't know why who ever took it won't return it.

The one thing that blew me away was that the kids that were vocalizing their anger were more mad at me that I wasn't letting them go then the person who stole the egg and wasn't returning it. I guess in their head they just didn't get it. The kids then start saying that someone must have come in the room and took it. No one came into the room during that time frame.

As I was arguing with the kids that it was the person who stole the egg that is keeping them in at lunch, three kids decided to jump out the window.

As you can see in the photo, this is not an easy feat. A fourth kid would have jumped but he would have been too big.

I felt so helpless because if I had tried to stop the jumpers, the other would have just walked out the door. Of course, this made me more angry. And I realized this. I also realized that one of the kids who jumped out the window could have been the thief. I knew I was about to lose it so I let the kids go and told them that this is so not over and it will be dealt with tomorrow!!

I told the VP about the whole thing asking for advice. He told me to write-up an incident sheet about the kids who jumped and they would be suspended (they weren't, by the way, they just got a lecture ... hmmph!). He suggested I threaten to fail the whole class on the assignment if the egg were not returned. I agreed.

The next day I told the kids about the failing and, of course they were pissed, but again, the vocal ones were pissed that I was unfair and it was just a stupid egg. Just shows that sometimes the vocal ones in a group don't get the point.

As I was explaining this, one kid kept talking over me. After I said, everyone would fail, every time I tried to talk, he'd start yelling. I kicked him out and told him to get some manners. He was one of the jumpers.

Three minutes later, I get a knock on the door, and I open it to find the missing egg on the ground in a Dixie cup. Hmm, I wonder who took it!!!

This whole situation was so frustrating! Another issue is that only two kids handed in the full assignment out of 13 in the class. This class in general just astounds me sometimes.

It's been a while

2007-04-25T16:23:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've blogged. Yes, I know. It's not that I don't have material, I do. It was just that I'm busy.

The funny thing is that I'm busier now than I have been but I decided to blog for the procrastination aspect. I find blogging almost therapeutic. Over the last few weeks, I've composed incredible witty entries with insight about teaching and being in this small town. It's just that I haven't typed them out yet.

So you may be asking, why am I so busy, and more specifically, why are you so busy now. Well, let me answer that.

Starting next week, there is a college trip for senior students (grade 10 to 12) who want to visit some of the colleges that are "around" here. These student had to apply for the trip and usually only students who want to go to college go. Usually, these are students who are doing well in their classes. Anyway, what does this mean for me?

I have four students who are going ... from 3 different classes. The kids are going for 10 days (7 instructional days). And all of them have asked for work they will miss when they are gone. Fair enough. Haha! Here is my problem.

As a first year teacher, I have never taught these classes before. I have no resources that I have made before (and the resources left for me are not that great, to be honest). So I have to plan for each class for everyday. Now as the "lazy" person I am, I usually don't plan a class until either the day before I teach the material or, if I'm really on top of things, two days before I teach it. I use to get into a little trouble for this during my student teaching days. But come on! Ask any university student and you'll probably get results that say something like 90% of them are working on a paper/project/assignment the night before it is due.

Before you start yelling at me, I do have year plans, and chapter plans and I always know where I'm going. It's the specifics I have to plan for.

So now my students have requested that I plan for seven lessons in three classes (that's 21 classes ... yes, I am a math teacher) before they go on a trip in a week. Uhh, that will be fun to try to do. Especially if they want them designed so that they can understand them without me there answering questions.

Oh, it gets worse.

All of the students have requested that I get the work to them before the weekend so they have 5 days to do it before they leave so they won't have to bring work with them.

HAHAHAHA! As if! The topper, is that I found this all out on Monday.

I told the kids I would try my best ... but for them not to hold their breath. They'll be very lucky that they have it before they leave in a week.

So my student are coming the way o some of my readers. So if you, reader, see a group of Native kids with two tired looking white adults, those are my kids!!!!!!

How to Gross Out a Teenage Boy

2007-04-12T17:13:00.000-07:00

Another Health and Career Education story.

For all four of my HCE classes, I've shown a video where I've managed to gross out all the teenage boys. The minimum reaction I've gotten is chairs scraping in the room and the guys going, "Ahhh!" The biggest reaction was from a real touch kid who got out of his seat, said, "This video is sick!" And stormed out of the room.

How did I accomplish this? I was showing a video on road safety and what could happen to you if you get into a car with a drunk driver or a driver who speeds for fun. The ER doctor in the video described what would happen if you came in in serious condition. He explained how the doctors would have to cut your clothes off and tie you down and how they would have to get you breathing and how they would have to empty your stomach and bladder.

The doctor on the video asked all the gentlemen in the room to hold up their pinkie finger. That is the width of the tube that the ER doctors would insert into your penis to empty your bladder.

And that piece of information has grossed out 100% of the teenage boys I've shown the video to.

Just some photos

2007-04-03T16:29:00.000-07:00

I'm pooped today ... not that it was a hard day ... it was just busy. So here are some photos of the last two days.

Here is the moon last night rising while the sun was setting. This is another picture off my deck that faces East. Imagine what the sunset would look like facing West!

Every year around this time the students gather on the field to pick up things ... you may think I was going to say Easter Eggs. But now, they pick up rocks. They get to clear the field of rocks. Fun.

One of the teacher's throwing a rock off the field. Why wasn't I helping? Because I was taking pictures from my deck. I have my prep block so I choose to "prep" by snapping pictures. Haha!

The kid in the I heart NY shirt is pretty funny. His fashion statement today was "tacky tourist". I'm not kidding! His hat today said, "#1 Dad". This kid is too much. I've blogged about him a few times already.

Out With the Old, in With the New

2007-03-31T16:27:00.000-07:00

I finally picked my TV up today. Of course, it arrived two weeks late ... and when I was on vacation.

It was quite an ordeal to pick it up. I had asked my coworkers for a boat ride over to the Sears counter on the next island over and they agreed. Unfortunately, they didn't want to go today because they thought the weather was bad. I was determined to get it though. So I took the seabus.

I'm not sure, but I think the seabus driver was flirting with me on the way there. Which worked to my advantage ... because I didn't quite think how big a 27 inch TV would be. I went to the Sears desk and they wheeled out my TV. It was mammoth! Just then I saw the sea bus driver walking by. So I gave him a come hither look and beckoned him over to help me. And he did! I thanked him profusely and he even offered to get me a free hot chocolate from the restaurant. It's amazing what a smile and the damsel in distress routine can get you.

My severely hung over co-worker help me on this side to load the TV from the seabus dock to her truck to my two-story walk up suite. I sent her on her way and managed to get the TV out of the box and on it's stand (my never used deep freeze that came with my furnished place).

The new TV is so much better than the old. It's big. I don't have to hit the new one with a hammer to make it work properly. And best of all, it has a remote! I never have to get off the couch again!

Stories from “Abroad”

2007-03-27T16:52:00.000-07:00

Here’s a funny picture I got when I was coming back from the gym with A. I thought it was funny because what is an “ass pepper” anyway? I know, I know, it probably stands for assorted peppers, but it was still funny.

So I was looking forward to eating fast food because we don’t have it up here in the Small Town. My second day down, I met up with one of my friends from education school and we went to the mall for some retail therapy. Of course we had to have lunch so we headed to the food court. What I really wanted was a Quizno’s sub but the line up was so long and since I’m not use to standing in lines, I decided to go to New York Fries for some poutine. Ahh, finally fast food. I was practically drooling because it had been months since I chowed down on heart-stopping grease.

As I was coming to the table, I was balancing the tray on my hand in an odd way as I was sitting down BAM, I spilled the whole thing on the seat next to me. After I swore like a truck driver, I up-righted the container to be left with three edible fries (Sorry, no 3 second rule for me).

This might have been a sign for me that maybe I shouldn’t be eating junk food. Nah! the fries weren’t very good – I think New York Fries has changed their oil to something more “nutritious”. I decided this was actually a blessing (a waste of $5, true) since I now had room in my stomach for some other fast food delicacy. I then went to A&W and had a Mozza Burger. Mmmm, it was so tastey.

I managed to eat a lot on my vacation including McDonald’s, Subway, Tim Horton’s, various travel food (including a buffet on a boat) and several "real" restaurants.

In other news, I got offered another one year contract for next year to continue teaching up here. I'm going to accept it. I'm pretty happy about that. It's nice to know I'll have a job next year. I also did really well on my evaluation, so when I do leave here, I'll have a good record to show future employers. Of course, I requested to not be teaching Health and Career Education. I check the tentative schedule and I'm down for teaching it. Oh well.

I finally figured out what I'll do when teaching that class. I'm testing my method on my new group (my last group for the year, phew). Every Thursday and
Friday will be movie day. I have 6 movies all lined up.
Office Space - Career Education (the joys of working in a cubical)
Dazed and Confused - Bullying and drug abuse
Super Size Me - Nutrition
Fahrenheit 9-11 – Bullying and school dynamics
Dangerous Minds - School is a right. Take advantage of it!
Kids - (very controversial) AIDS and sexual promiscuity

My last group was royally pissed off when they learned this group got to watch movies every week!

The Big Get Away Part 4

2007-03-23T17:46:00.000-07:00

So A finally got home from work, after calling to let me know he had to work late. That night we had dinner, that his mom made. That's right. His mom made dinner. His parents were pretty nice, they even bought me some soy yogurt since I don't really eat dairy. It was sweet of them.

We watched two more hockey games (I like hockey so it was good) and then watched a movie. During this time I tried to be more affectionate because I thought maybe he was a bit stand-offish with me because he may have thought I wasn't into him. So I held his hand and smiled at him lots and tried snuggling with him, etc. It was around midnight and we went to bed. And A didn't try anything. Grrr! Ok, something was totally up. There were other clues, like the working thing and he didn't say any of the nice things he said to me online. Plus, when we went to bed that night he was faced the other way of when he was on his back and I'd get close, he'd hold me but not face me. So I initiated "the talk".

I asked if he was into me and let him know there were signs that he wasn't. I kept going by saying that maybe he was a bit off because I didn't really initiate anything (from my not really "feeling it" off the bat). He replied by talking about pheromones. That's when I drowned him out. I heard him say he knew I was a sweet girl with a kind heart but he had a different opinion of what I'd be, blah,blah, blah.

I let him know that I was a little sad and that I wasn't trying to manipulate him or get anything from the following action. And then I starting crying, I'm gonna be honest (I'm smiling now so it's all good). I was sad that we both weren't what we thought each other would be. I was sad that I spend a month of excitement for such a let down. I was sad that I planned a vacation to see this guy instead of see my family and my kick-ass pregnant sister for this. Through my tears I explained that I wasn't mad at him or I didn't want him to feel bad, I just was sad. I then told him I wanted to leave the next day. He was ok with that. And he even held me for a while. Once I calmed down a bit I starting thinking about why I didn't wasn't compatible with him.

This is why I call him A and not by his real name. He has a few little "quirks" I haven't mentioned yet. First off, his hobby is farting, I swear to God. He was always farting ... and the second night I was there is was these really nasty smelly ones. And he thought it was funny. The last day I was there, actually, he kept trying to wrestle me to the ground to fart on my head. What was he, 12? No, he's 22.

The second quirk is that he was a picker. He'd pick his nose when he thought I was looking, though I'd see him out of the corner of my eye. I confronted him on this that night. He would also pick at his face, which made me sad because he is so handsome and I hate to see him get scars. He also bites his nails.

So my last day there I think was our best. Since I was leaving I think we both really loosened up. We play video games .. mostly hockey where he kicked my ass. It made him pretty giddy though because every time he scored, he grab me and kiss me on the check ... which was the most affectionate he was with me the whole time. But like I mentioned above, he tried some wrestling moves on me which I wasn't too happy about and he'd try to fart on my head.

He dropped me off at the bus station so I could head off into the sunset of my life (I ended up coming to visit my family). We hugged and said our good-byes and wished each other luck. Blah blah blah.

I have talked to him since online. It's funny now that I've met him how I can picture him and know his tone when he types and I can read between the lines. I'm curious if he will ever find the mature relationship his is looking for because he needs to do some serious growing up.

The Big Get Away Part 3

2007-03-22T11:26:00.000-07:00

Warning: this entry could be quite graphic and people, like say my brother, may not like to know that much information about me.

We had discussed ... a lot ... about how physical our relationship would get. And I told him if everything was as comfortable as it was online, we most likely would have a ... ahem ... physical relationship. So we went back to his house. I knew I was going to be sleeping in his bed with him because, heck, I like cuddling. He was ok if nothing besides sleep happened.

Ok, more background. A lives on his own in a condo that his parents own. They pay the mortgage and he pays all the other bills and things. It's a three bedroom condo. Well, it just tuns out that A's parents were coming for a visit two days before I was suppose to arrive (they live in New Zealand). Sucky! This means that A had to relocate to "his" room while he parents got the master suite for their visit. It also meant that A had some serious re-organizing and cleaning to do before we all arrived. It also meant that our romantic week would be infringed on by live-in parents. Grrr!

So I got to briefly meet the parents and then we went to his room for bed. I looked around his room and noticed four things that totally reminded me of Asshole. He had computer parts everywhere (he is a system administrator so I knew he was a computer guy), he had a loud Hawaiian shirt in his closet, he also had a very similar bathrobe to Asshole's and he has a shark tooth necklace ... just like Asshole. I kept getting these bad signs but I chose to ignore them. Anyway, I had to take my contact lenses out so I went to the bathroom. And it was scary. The sink looked like it hadn't been cleaned in a long time. In fact, I ended up cleaning it a day later because it was gross... there was shaving hair everywhere. The toilet was also dirty. It didn't have like poop on the seat or anything but I'm willing to bet it hadn't been cleaned in at least 3 months. I ended up cleaning that too.

So we finally got to our sleeping or other-activity dilemma. We decided on other activities. We tried kissing and we were out of sync. Bad. I also don't think I liked his method of kissing. Yada-yada-yada, we went to sleep. It was alright. I've had better ... none as strong as A, but better.

The next day was kinda blah. We went to the gym where I did a lot of time on the treadmill and he worked out with his buddy. We then went to get me a toothbrush (I always forget something when I go on a trip!) and then we went back to his place to shower. I was trying to keep the romance alive and suggested we shower together.

Usually this is not always great because someone always ends up out of the water and cold. But his shower was well suited for two and I was never cold. The shower would have been pretty good except in was in the scuzzy bathroom form hell!!!! I didn't end up cleaning this because it would have taken way too long. I'm still in denial that I used that shower three times. The mold coming of the sliding door looked like hair. Enough said. The next two times I used it I didn't have my contacts in so I couldn't see what was around me.

The rest of the day was ok. We sat around watching hockey and a movie. But something was not quite right. It was not what I thought it would be. It was awkward at moments and we didn't seem to have the intimacy that we had online.

The next morning proved my point. A was going to work. He told me before I came down that he was going to take some days off to spend with me. Apparently, this was not the case. I knew something was up. I ended going out with one of my education friends and we went shopping and I got a pedicure. But I was going to confront A about where we stood and about a BIG issue that I haven't mentioned yet ...

To be con't ....

The Big Get Away Part 2

2007-03-21T18:57:00.000-07:00

Things really started to heat up between A and I. It felt like we were actually dating without all the physical stuff. We talked about our days and sent each other little "like" notes (I would say luv notes even, it came to using that variant of the word, but I was not ready to say something like "love" to someone I had never met). As more time went by, the more we were looking forward to meeting each other and we started planning our whole week together and said how great it was going to be.

Ok, I needed a little break, I got a bit teary there.

We even exchanged phone numbers during the last week of our pre-meet courtship and we call each other three or four times. It was all very nice and exciting. I was so looking forward to Break so I could finally meet this great guy. I was also very nervous about the whole thing, you know the whole not meeting yet being very personable with each other. And like I said, I feel I really conveyed who I am to him and let him know everything possible about me that he wanted to know. I did not send him naked pictures or anything (I just thought I'd share that) because of the whole teacher thing and my rule of never having pictures of me out there that I would be mortified if students saw. He didn't send me pictures because he doesn't have a digital camera but there were pictures of him on the website that we met on that his friends had posted and he looked cute on them (just a heads up, there was no lying on his part so don't get worried).

The big day arrived. I was finally flying down to meet this guy who I was practically in a relationship with. We had discussed in detail of what the first meeting would be like. We even discussed where we put our arms when we hug. I was ready. Nervous, but ready.

So a little more background on me. I get super travel sick. So I took an extra strength Gravol to make it so I didn't puke the whole flight down. I informed A I would be doing this and explained to him that I may not be myself since I haven't taken these pills before. They didn't seem to effect me too much in the end (except making me not air sick) except I did notice my hands were shaking at the airport in the Big City either from nerves, the medication or my hate of flying...

I arrived at the airport. And he was not there. I was confident he would show up. I was just a little disappointed that he wasn't there when I arrived. Part of that was that I explained to him about my issues with people being late. In my childhood, my dad would always say he was coming to visit and he would be either hours late or even days late. I spend a lot of time waiting for my dad to show up as a kid and I know it still has an impact on me. I called A and he was running late so I decided to wait for him outside.

He arrived about 10 minutes later. I knew it was him because he had told me what his car looks like. He stepped out of the car and I saw one of the best looking guys I have ever seen. He was gorgeous. I started to shake a bit because I couldn't believe my luck. In hind sight, I was pretty dumbfounded. I got all awkward and kinda stumbled over my suitcase and gave him a crappy hug because I was still trying to up-right my suitcase.

We decided to take off and go for a meal.

I was still a bit awkward and babbled a bit, but if anyone out there knows me, I do this stuff all the time. I finally came to my sense by the time we hit the restaurant and I was feeling myself.

But he kept just staring at me. It made me nervous. We had a nice enough meal and then we were off to his (ex-girl) friend's birthday party. He's remained friends with most of his exs (and he has a lot, apparently). She seemed nice and I asked how the met. They met on Hot or Not. Hmmm, I knew he wasn't new to this dating on-line thing, but I didn't know I would get to meet one!

The party was at a pub and it was alright. A and I spent most of the time watching the hockey game. It was now time to go back to his place.

To be con't....

The Big Get Away Part 1

2007-03-20T20:31:00.000-07:00

I think to entice readers and keep myself busy for several days while on vacation, I will tell my story. It does not end happily. It ends in heartbreak. But I do have a smile on my face and I've already started telling jokes about it. It has nothing to do with teaching.

It started on February 18. I have a couple myspace - type webpages to communicate with various friends. Anyway, I got a message from someone whom I've never met before saying that it was too bad that I wasn't in The Big City anymore because I looked "delicious". I don't get many compliments like that from strangers and I guess I was flattered. I messaged back to say that the comment made my day, which it did. We messaged back and forth a few times and he seemed sane so I added him to my friend list and to my MSN. I'm going to call him A because his real name starts with an A (what with me and guys' names that start with A, my only three real boyfriends have all had names that start with A).

I got to see pictures of him and a glimpse into his life and he seemed relatively sane (so as not to scare you reader, he is quite sane just a little bizarre). We seemed to have some common interests and we were flirting even more. He said he was interested in meeting me and possibly having a relationship with me.

I was a little taken aback by this because I'm not one for the whole internet dating thing. I like to meet people to get their whole "vibe" before I consider dating them. Plus, I tell my students all the time that they should never meet someone they meet on line because it could be, like, a 40-year-old pedophile. But he seemed genuine and nice and my brother did meet his ex-online and my dad met his wife online.

I knew I had to leave the Small Town for Spring Break or I would go a bit nuts so I considered that a detour to A's place may be a possibility.

Over the last month, we chatted everyday and really got to know each other as best we could online. I really opened up to him, being totally honest with him and letting him see the real me. I told him about my flaws and strengths and my future plans and just about everything. We were really hitting it off. A was saying how much he liked me and couldn't wait to meet me and that maybe I was the girl for him. I was a bit skeptic that he could be so into me so quickly, and I was caught up in the flattery and the hopes of actually dating a nice guy. I agreed that it would be great to meet him and that I'd come to his town as his guest to meet him.

To be con't ...

Stop snowing!!!

2007-03-14T17:05:00.000-07:00

I wish it would stop snowing already, it's snowed here for the last 3 days ... i am trying to fly out on Saturday and the plane won't go during snow! Grrr...

In other news, report cards are due the day after Spring Break so I'm trying to get them done before I leave so I have no work on my awesome break.

Here's some pictures I took this morning. The pictures do no justice to the actually scene.

Friday Random Shuffle

2007-03-09T16:32:00.000-08:00

Because I'm busy ...

1. Day Old Hate - City and Colour
2. Light in your Eyes - Sheryl Crow
3. North American for Life - Matthew Good
4. Breakin’ Up - Gwen Stefani
5. Symbol in my Driveway - Jack Johnson
6. Greedy Fly - Bush
7. Pretty Vegas -INXS
8. In da Club - 50 Cent
9. This Love - Maroon 5
10. No Mermaid - Shaye

My Health and Career Education class were being dicks today, well actually they were dicks the last few days. They bitch and complain we never do anything fun like go to the computer lab or go to the store (which is never really an option ever).

So I took their suggestions into account, because I try to make the class fun and I try to take their suggestions seriously. So I book a class in the computer lab on Wednesday and planned a whole lesson around using the computer to watch some video, and playing some games and answering some questions. I thought the lesson was pretty fun, and I'm not saying that just as a teacher.

Well, the kid who is the biggest bitcher got bored after 5 minutes, announced the class sucked and sulked in his chair. I had an alternative assignment that was kinda boring (for the kids who were abusing their computer privilege ... reading 5 pages of notes and then answering questions. Well, he wanted t o go back to the classroom and do those. And then a few other kids decided that they wanted to do the same thing. Then one kids really wanted to work on the boring questions in the office. So now half my class is not in the computer lab... let's just say that's the last time we go to the computer lab.

Then today, as the kids were finishing up their questions ... well some of them anyway ... they started saying that it would be fun to try to make all the new teachers leave this year by being brats and not doing their work. A couple kids chimed in that that would be fun.

I basically told them that the only people they would be hurting is themselves because their marks would suffer and there was no one to blame but themselves. I also told them that they could try this if they wanted, but it wouldn't make me leave because other kids in the school are not brats and they would make me stay. I also mentioned that if teachers left here and reported to the outside world that the kids here are jerks, that would not look good on the community. The kids say that they always say how crappy it is here. I asked them if they honestly thought that ... and then I compared that statement to how we treat our siblings. It's ok for me to insult my brother and hit him, but if some other kid did that to him, I'd beat the snot out of that kid. My students laughed and seemed to agree with me. I hope I made them rethink the brat thing because that would just make my job harder.

Hot for Teacher

2007-03-05T18:50:00.000-08:00

Well, it finally happened ... I have been made a sexual object while being a teacher. Let me explain.

First off, I'd like to comment on my sexuality. I think I have a good sexual side. I've commented on some sexual issues in this blog. I also think I have healthy sex drive and enjoy exploring that.

But never, ever do I even hint at this in my classroom. I try to be as sexless as possible. True, I look professional and nice, but I consciously wear things with no cleavage and no midriff showing. I also never talk about my love life and I refuse to answer any such questions about it. I'm not just saying this because it's part of the teacher's code of ethics, I honestly think I go the extra mile to be this way. It works because the students have never joked with me with sexual innuendos. Never. And I'm glad.

Part of my reasons for this is because I'm a new teacher who is fairly young ... but more important I look young (I always get ID'd when I buy alcohol). This works partly to my advantage because I think some students feel more comfortable with me because they think I can relate to them because I'm closer to their age than other teachers. But, the whole young thing can work to a huge disadvantage if the students think they can date me or if they sexualize me.

Well, I have my profile and some pictures up on a popular Myspace-type forum that the majority of the students here use. Actually, I joined it to spy on them. But I've shared pictures of my friends and family and the kids chat with me on there about school and the community and stuff ... all innocent. 99% of my contacts on this site are my students or other students in the school.

Well, the dad of one of my students (she's a 17 year old girl) left a comment on my picture (that was publicly published) that read, "Van Halen said it best when they said I'm HOT for teacher".

Ahhhh! Oh my! I deleted the comment because I didn't want the students to see it ... especially his daughter since she frequents my site.

What was this guy thinking? First, I'm young enough to be his daughter! Second, why on earth would he sexualize a teacher that teaches his own daughter? Thirdly, what does he think other students would do when they see that? Fourthly, if he really wanted a chance with me (which he has none, especially now) , why would he say something like that publicly?

I don't have the nerve to tear him a new one publicly (unless he leaves another comment like that or asks me why I deleted his comment) because as much as I don't want to be sexualized in a semi-school setting, I don't want to be the uptight teacher with "no sense of humour" in a community I'm trying to infiltrate. Honestly, I don't feel victimized here (even though the comment was a classic example of sexual harassment) but I do feel a bit angry and mystified that this dad didn't think before he posted a comment like that about his daughter's teacher in a place crawling with other students.

Bird Dance

2007-03-03T09:52:00.000-08:00

First off. I know it's been over a week since my last post ... things have been busy here. Well, not so busy here, but in my life ... but I promise to give the full scoop in about two weeks ... so stay tuned.

Yesterday we had our Health Hearts assembly ... a little late since Valentine's day was two weeks ago, but hey, that's "Indian time".

It was mainly a show case of the elementary students howing how they keep a healthy heart through dance. The kindergarten boys did The Chief's Welcome Dance and the girls did The Ladies Welcome Dance. The grade one class danced to a song to honour a community member who wrote the song. These songs are preformed with drummers and live singers.

One of the grade 2 classes was to do The Bird Dance. I was thinking to myself, "Ok, I've been to quite a few celebrations and I haven't yet seen the bird dance. I'm in for a treat!" I see the teacher cue some music, which was usual because I was expcting drum/singing. The music comes on ... and guess what it was...

The Chicken Dance!

I laughed my ass off. The students around me were wondering why I was laughing so hard. I even tried to bribe some of my studens with 100 tokens to come up with me and join in. I had no takers though

Who writes these things? Morons?!?!

2007-02-23T16:25:00.000-08:00

I swear that morons write textbooks. For example ...

Math 10 ... one question is about planets. It asks the student to find the circumferance of Uranus. The kids laughed about that for 10 minutes. Come on textbook companies, use another planet ... there are only 7 others to choose from ... neptune is a nice planet!

The literacy book. I've lectured my kids over again that the use of "gay" as an insult is unacceptable in the classroom. I've even threatened to send kids to the office if I heard it again in class. Well, one kid muttered something about gay and I sighed really loudly and gave him, "I'm going to lecture you now look"*

He looked at me and said, "It's in the book honest!"

And loll and behold, the book is talking about how you want to be a lawer at the offices of Brown & Gaylord... who the hell thought of this stuff?!? Why would they publish this in a textbook for teenagers ... to make the teacher's life more difficult?!? This is a very current textbook, they should know better. Yeah, I know Gaylord is a name, but, come on ... why couldn't they just put Smith or Wong or something just as common?

* I hate lecturing students. I've only done it once and I felt a real asshole, but sometimes, it's what I gotta do.

Dude

2007-02-19T18:06:00.000-08:00

I'm on a dude crusade... I told one of my co-workers this and she got the wrong idea so let me explain.

I say "dude" way too much! As in,

"Dude! You so can't do that!"

Anyway, we have a token economy at school where kids can earn prizes with tokens they earn from school staff. This month's focus is "support". So I'm asking the students to support me in not saying dude. I told each of my classes, and any other student around, that if they heard me say dude, they could call me on it and I'd give them a token. I commented that this deal was also valid outside school.

Today is day one, and so far I've given away more than half a dozen tokens. My big slip up was when I was chasing a student back into class, and I said, "Dude! As If!" I was the first one to catch me, but a couple of students who knew about the deal ran up to me to collect their token (some from way down the hall too, but it was quiet in the hall so they heard me).

A couple of people commented on my use of dude when I mentioned my crusade. Two students said that I got them saying dude and now when they say it, they think of me. One teacher told me that she used dude in one of her assignments to be funny (like me) and the students commented that she's starting to sound like me. That's how often I use dude. People associate the word with me.

My reasons for doing this came at the anti-valentine's day party. I said it a couple of times and the VP mentioned that I say it a lot. He joked that he's scared I'll call one of the school members, or worse yet, an tribe elder "dude". I don't think I would, but, hey, you never know.

So now I'm off dude. Of course, it's always valid when refering to Lebowski :)

Bud Earphones

2007-02-18T13:42:00.000-08:00

Like I've mentioned, I recently purchased an iPod. I know, I know, I'm like one of the last people to get one of these things. I remember when they came out, every one was gaga over the headphones.

They have superior sound, blah blah blah. But I hate them. I hate bud earphones. They don't fit my ears. And I sure as heck know it's not my ears fault. I have lovely ears. In fact, I have perfect ears. They are the one body part that I've never had anyone criticize, including myself. In fact, people comment on how lovely they are. The are small and delicate. So I guess bud headphones are just too big for my small, delicate ears. They constant fall out. I've seen people jog with these things in and they don't fall out. On me, I'm just sitting there and out they pop.

So I ordered some decent earphones from Sears. Along with a NEW TV!!!!! I'm getting a nice 27 inch flat screen. The total cost of both items, along with shipping, fit nicely in my $500 credit card limit. Sweet! The only problem is that Sears doesn't do home delivery on TVs. So I have to go to the nearest store to pick it up. When I got the call for that, I almost cried ... until I learned the nearest store(which is a catalogue ordering place) happens to be on the same island as the watering hole. I'll just need someone strong (hopefully my crush!?!?) to go with me to carry the TV from the "store" to the sea bus and then someone to give me a ride from the dock to my house.

Top Ten Shuffle

2007-02-17T14:30:00.000-08:00

As a tribute to Toccata (who got the idea from someone else), I thought I'd do a top ten shuffle.

1. If It Makes You Happy - Sheryl Crow
2. Just Missed the Train - Kelly Clarkson
3. Smack That - Akon feat. Eminem
4. Dot (Shut up) - Destiny's Child
5. The More I Talk - David Shumka
6. In the Water I am Beautiful - City and Colour
7. Gloomy - Matt Costa
8. Must get Out - Maroon 5
9. Santa Monica - Theory of a Deadman
10. Let's Get it On - Matthew Good band

I'm gonna comment on Smack That for a while. The first time I "heard" this song it was coming out of one of my grade 8's mouth. I don't quite know if he knows what he was saying:

Smack that all on the floor
Smack that give me some more
Smack that 'til you get sore
Smack that, oh ohhh ohhh oh

The next time I heard about this song was from one of my grade 10s when she was commenting that she hates in the video how he inhales in the jail cell when he's singing the song. Hmm, so many things wrong with that sentence. I finally heard the song. And it's catchy, dammit! So much so that I downloaded it from iTunes ... I actually paid 99¢ for it!

I looked up "Smack That in the urban dictionary. I was wondering if it had anything to do with "Hit me" like in that stupid Britney Spears song. Smack that refers to the noise made when doing it doggie style! Oh my!

I'm a bit torn about liking the song. Do I like the message it sends out? Well, I'm not comfortable talking about sexual positions in public. But a lot of songs are about sex, they just disguise it better. They talk about making love ... which I guess sounds better because it implies some sort of feelings involved. Which is a message that society accepts more.

But is there really that much difference between the acceptable love songs that talk about holding each other while they make passionate love all night long, or about a guy who likes to fuck his girl really hard from behind?

The Watering Hole

2007-02-15T14:34:00.000-08:00

When the teachers go out to drink, we go to the next town over ... accessible by boat only. There is a nicer (relative to the restaurant here, no offense)restaurant over there with a bub area as well. There is a taxi we can get, it's $5 round trip. Community members do venture over to the next town for the finer ambiance to dine and drink too ... but the people who tend to frequent the bar in town, don't venture out to the "nicer" restaurant.

There was a beautiful rainbow yesterday that I managed to capture "on film". The pot of gold would happen to fall on the restaurant that we frequent in the next town (it's just behind the point seen in the picture). I thought that was neat.

Missed opportunity

2007-02-14T14:47:00.000-08:00

My horoscope this month says that I will start dating a guy that will treat me right around mid-month. Cool, that'd be nice. It's around mid-month now. And I do have a little crush on a guy (who's my age too). Now all I need is an opportunity.

I'm sick. As in I have a cold. Ok, big deal.

So I decide to go to the store for some soup. So I brave it out there, no make-up. Looking like crap, in general.

I'm just about to pay for my groceries and I feel a sneeze coming on. I put my arm up to sneeze on (because my hands are full of groceries) and sneeze.

Well, this is the most disgusting sneeze I've ever had, I swear. I even repressed some of it too. Anyway, there is this huge pile of mucus on my sleeve. Yes, pile. Huge. Gross! It was so gross, I had to extract a tissue from my pants to wipe off my sleeve. I manage to do all this and then get my groceries on the conveyor belt.

I'm walking to put my basket back while the clerk is scanning in my groceries and I look up just in time to see my crush say hello to me. Damn! I've been waiting weeks to spot him in public and here I am sick and looking crappy! I say hi back a bit flustered hoping he didn't see my snot fireworks moments earlier.

I manage to get my groceries and start walking home. I spot my crush walking up ahead of me with his buddy. I'm walking behind them for a while hoping that they don't turn around to see me. Then I start wishing they would turn around so I could talk to him. So I cough pitifully hoping they turn around. The buddy turns around a few times to stare at me, but my crush doesn't (I don't know the buddy and I don't think he knows me either). I end up walking behind them the ENTIRE way home. They literally walk by my front door. I get into the house and realize ... THAT WAS MY OPPORTUNITY! I could have called out at the beginning of the walk home and walked home with them. I'm so silly. How old am I, 12? It would have been the neighbourly thing to do for me to actually walk with them. Crap! Oh well, live and learn.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Old Technology

2007-02-12T18:19:00.000-08:00

I love tech toys. I have quite a few. One of my favorites being my GPS. My latest being an 80 Gig iPod.

But one thing I own that is super old is a TV from 1983.

I've dated guys younger than the TV!

The TV technically belongs to the-guy-I-lived-with-once-upon-a-time-ago's uncle. I kept it after we broke up and I've never had the need to get another one. True, I have to use the knob on the front to turn it on and off, and I need to get up and turn the same knob to adjust the volume. But I do have it hooked up to my VCR to change the channel via remote.

But the TV is starting to break down. Sometimes the picture scrunches up and I have to hit it on the top with a hammer.

I've been thinking about getting a new one but it will be such a hassle to get one up here. I guess one of the main reasons I've been thinking this lately happened when I had some friends over. One guy looked at my TV and said, "I think my picture in picture is bigger than your TV."

Chalk

2007-02-11T12:55:00.000-08:00

I have both a chalk board and a white board in my classroom. I prefer the chalk board because I don't get high off chalk dust, unlike white board pen fumes.

But when you work with chalk, even when you have a chalk holder, you get chalk dust all over your hands.

I have a thing for cute underwear and socks. In fact I have one whole drawer in my dresser for socks and one whole drawer for underwear. Excessive, I know. I think I could last a month easily without washing any of these items and still have clean ones left.

Anyway, cute underwear is often synonymous with uncomfortable. I'm cool with that. But I learned a very valuable lesson about this.

Never, ever, ever pick out a wedgie at school when you are wearing dark pants and you work with chalk.

Chaos and peeing

2007-02-06T17:21:00.000-08:00

Here is some (disturbing?) insight into me.

I love math. That is no surprise. I teach it, I have a degree in it.

This summer I was taking a math education course and we had to do a group project/teaching presentation on a topic. The professor gave us a list of possible topics and said we should pick one that we haven't studied before. Since I was one of the only people in the class with a math degree, I had studied a lot of the topics. One topic I hadn't studied was chaos theory. I've always had a thing for chaos theory, and here is why.

Have you seen Jurassic Park? It came out when I was 13 and it was one of the only movies my family owned. So I've seen it 15 million times. There is a small scene that introduced me to chaos theory. Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldbloom's character), a mathematician, is explaining/hitting on Dr. Ellie Sattler (Laura Dern's character) and explaining how chaos theory works via an example with a drop of water traveling down her hand . This scene stuck in my head for some reason.

I was thinking about it once when I was going pee. I notice that when I go pee, the pee never travels out of my body into the toilet the same way. Sometimes it's fast, sometimes it's slow, sometimes it dribbles down my butt, etc. I've experimented too, thinking about this chaos. I've tried positioning myself different ways too ... I've sat straight up, I've slouched, I've bent my torso over my legs, I've hovered above the seat, etc. Then it changes depending how diluted my urine is with water. It also changes depending on my hair style. I've spent way too much time thinking about urinating and chaos theory.

Anyway, I ended up convincing my group to do chaos theory where we showed the clip in Jurassic Park to the class as an intro to chaos theory. We then ended up playing with double pendulums to look at something that moves chaotically. We got a good mark on our project.

Yes, I did tell my group why I wanted to do chaos. They thought it was funny, and a bit strange .. .but they weren't so weirded out because they know I'm a bit bizarre.

If I ever do my PhD in math (which I think I'll never do), I'd like to explore the chaos of peeing. It would at least amuse the people evaluating my thesis.

What a rip off!

2007-02-03T16:32:00.000-08:00

So I finally washed my way to my next fortune, with my fortune soap. Here's what I think of this fortune:

Why, may you ask? Here's what it said:
Your lucky numbers are 1 5 8 20 25 42
Use them wisely.

Crap! I could have really used some wisdom here. Well, in all fairness, my favorite number is 5. I can think of meaning with almost each of the remaining numbers. Some good, some bad ...

1 is what I am. I think out of the entire community, I'm the first listing in the phone book.

8 is the number I was with the guy I last slept with. Ouch! Before that I was 1 or 4.

20 was the age I was when I got my absolutely drunkest ever. I paid for that for days.

25 was the day I got home on Christmas Vaction. It was also the age I was when I got into education school.

42 ... hmm. No meaning yet for me. Maybe that number will bring me luck!

Identity

2007-02-01T18:37:00.000-08:00

So today, I'm in the general store and the person in front of me is having her groceries scanned in. The person behind me is chatting with her, and sees that she's buying canned oysters. She jokes with the person in front of me that it must be a hot night today (mind you, the entire time one of my student's is standing right there. She the niece of the lady in front of me). The lady in front, jokes back that it's not even Friday either.

I know that oysters are considered an aphrodisiac ... but they are usually raw and on the half shell. Well, I was informed by the lady behind me that canned oysters are the village aphrodisiac. Then she said I should get some. I kind of giggled nervously and said I'd keep that in mind. She then asked me if I was the one dating R. Nope, not me. It's my co-worker. But man, gossip spreads here. I think everyone here knows that one of the new, young teachers in dating R. So all you have warned me that people will know (and talk), I heading you.

Anyway, the lady continued by saying that I should snap up a man here before June. I asked why, do they all go away then. She said yes. Strange conversation.

Another identity moment I had was in class. One student (the same one who hacked into Coldplay's site) was asking me about a new musician who has a very similar name to mine. This musician is English. He said, well, she could be you. She's white. I replied that she may be white and have a similar name as me, but her eyes and hair are dark. I continued by saying that I have light eyes. Here's a picture.

He then said to me, "You have light eyes!?!" And then looked into my eyes for like the first time. I replied that I have blue eyes.

He just looked at me and said, quite surprised, "You're a white lady!" He seemed shocked by this realization. Do my blue eyes totally define me as such? Did he never think of me as white until that moment? Hmmm, the mysteries.

Playing

2007-01-30T16:27:00.000-08:00

So it's after school and I'm on my way home from the store. I walk by the school playground on my way home from the store. There were a bunch of kids playing and Andrew was supervising. I went over to say hi. I noticed the kids were having lots of fun on this thing that slides on a rail. See pictures for illustration. The kids use momentum to swing back to a platform. So the kids (and I and anyone under about 5' 11") are too short to reach the slidey-thing from the ground so if the kid doesn't make it back to the platform ,they usually need a push. This is a complicated playground apparatus, but I'm not going to sit here and write about the whole thing because it detracts from my blog.

Anyway, the kids are having lots of fun. So I want to try. As I'm standing in line, some of the kids are making small talk with me and ask me my name. I tell them.

"Oh, I've heard of you!" One kid says.

"I hope it was good what you heard about me," I reply.

"Oh yeah!"

That made me feel good.

So I go on the slidey thing. I make it to the other end fine, but I didn't bounce off the other end well enough and I didn't have enough momentum to make it to the platform again. So I had to let go. But I've seen some kids have to do this and they manage to throw the handle back. I didn't even manage to do that!!!

And to add insult to injury, my arms are killing me. So I've come up with a new workout for adults. It's called "playing". You do the monkey bars and the flips and do the slidey thing. You are bound to get great upper body strength. And its fun too! I'm going to start my new workout tomorrow!

Fame Whore

2007-01-28T15:23:00.000-08:00

One of the perks about being is a teacher is claiming fame through a student. My newest "claim to fame" is that one of my students hacked into one of Coldplay's websites.

He did it so he could hack their site counter and put it on his site. I usually don't condone such behavior because it is generally illegal and the kid could get into trouble. I asked him how he did it, thinking he cracked some serious Java Script or some other code. He did it by guessing that their password was 1234. This is just another reason why NO ONE should use 1234 as their password! I thought it was pretty funny. He even got props as being "some bratty kid in Canada" that hacked their site. We all got a good laugh when there were 68 posts on how my student should "die" or "burn in hell" for hacking into the site. My favorite is someone called my student a "fucktard". He's not, he's just a kid trying to have some fun and lucked out. All I can say is SWEET!(That's an inside joke I have with one of my classes).

Hard Week

2007-01-27T09:59:00.000-08:00

It was a hard week this week. Not so much for me because I'm unfamiliar with all the circumstances, but it was hard to be amongst all those who felt so much pain.

Of course, there was the death of a community member. She is the mother of two of the students at the school. The school staff were asked to make refreshments for one of the four memorials before the funeral. I didn't know the deceased at all. I never met her before. I didn't even know her name before she died. I could only identify her children in the school. I decided to stay for the memorial that I made sandwiches for since I've never been to one before and because I felt it would be almost rude to drop off food and leave.

It was a hard thing to sit through. I almost cried a few times. It was hard to see people I know stand up and just breakdown when they tried to say something about her.

This may seem cold, but being at this memorial made me realize something. I never want a Christian memorial. Why? Some of the stuff the pastor said pissed me off. Here are the three children that are left behind, one in his early 20s, one who is around 14 and another who is around 12. They just lost their mom. Their birth father died 2 years ago (they have their step dad though). And the pastor is saying stuff like, you may think you know the pain of missing your mom now, but you don't. You can't begin to know what it's like to not have her touch you anymore, hug you anymore, tell you she's proud of you, etc. She went on like this for like two or three minutes. Her point is that "God" will help them get through the pain. I'm thinking, screw you lady. How dare you say things like this to them now. Their mother just died and these kids are devastated. If you ever looked in the eyes of a young person who just lost their beloved mother, you will see what real pain is. I almost wanted to stand up and tell her to shut up. Did she honestly think these were comforting words to the children right now?

I don't know. Maybe it was just an insensitive pastor. Or maybe this is the Christian way. Either way, I sure don't want anyone saying things like that at my memorial. In fact, I don't want a memorial ... let alone 4. I'd want a brief funeral where people can be as fucking sad as they want. Then, I want a party to celebrate my life. People can be sad here too, if they want, but I want people to tell crazy-assed stories about me and celebrate all the good moments they had with me. Death is just the tiniest, briefest moment of life. I don't want people dwelling on that one little aspect of my "life".

The funeral itself was on Thursday. This was the last day of the semester for the kids and the last day of my health class with this set of students. Well, since this is such a tight knit community, almost the entire town went to the funeral. Out of ten students in my last class, only one showed up. We finished the movie we started the day before. The next group I get is a grade 9 group. I'm a bit scared. This group happens to have the kid who's mom just died.

The settlement feast was also on Thursday. I attended this. This was my second settlement feast. Basically, a settlement feast is where the community gathers to witness gifts being given to the family and gifts the family wants to give. I stayed for the first three hours, but I couldn't stand to be there anymore so I left. This may have been frowned upon, I'm not sure. I hope I didn't piss off too many community members, but I guess I'll see in the future. But, hey, I can't please everyone.

The other hard part of the week was the pro-d day we had yesterday. The topic was residential schools. If you don't know what one is, I highly recommend you find out. Basically, in the mid 1800s the Canadian Government had this brilliant plan to deal with their "Indian Problem" of trying to gain land and assimilate the First Nation population. They made it law that they would forcibly take the people's children and ship them off to a far away schools and force them to learn the dominant, Euro-centric "culture". And the things they did to these children to get them to do this were atrocities. We only got a brief synopses of the things done to these children. They were not allowed to speak their native languages. Punishments included getting your mouth washed out with soap and needles through the tongue. The kids were forbidden to interact with their siblings. And then there were all the other things done to the children. The intense labour, the strict rules, the mental, physical, and sexual abuse of the children. The inadequate food. I could go on and on. This was all a form of genocide. In fact, when Canada adopted the Genocide Convention in 2000 , it left out 60% of it so that it would not be accused of committing genocide here.

Anyway, the main focus of out pro-d, way to discuss the impacts these school have had on us now. I was shocked to see how this strongly effects the entire community today. Besides the loss of language and culture that this community is trying so hard to gain back, the loss of basic humanness still impacts this community. Very few of the aboriginal school staff attended residential schools, but most of them had had parents, siblings, grandparents, aunties, and uncles who attended them. And the scars felt by these people are amazing. The loss of trust and the fear of love impacted the families. The ingrained fear of using the language has left these future generations mute. We now see the youth feeling awkward to practice their culture because their parents were too scared or forgot and were unable to teach them. The biggest obstacle is that no one wants to talk about it. It's almost taboo. I mentioned it to M's mom, and she said that the topic should just be left alone – that it opens to many wounds. But that was the whole point of our pro-d ... that it needs to b talked about to be healed.

I'm only hinting at what on yesterday, but it was very tough. People broke down, we were all quite somber. There is hope though. My biggest thought was that I wish the student's were there to see this. Some of my students have never heard of a residential school. They have no idea what happened to their relatives. Yet, I don't know if I'm someone who should be teaching them about it.

Busy

2007-01-21T18:49:00.000-08:00

I feel like I've neglected my blog, and I want to give a quick update.

The first semester ends after this week. This doesn't effect me too much, except, I'll be teaching grade 9 health and career planning. And math 12 in about two and a half weeks (when my two- person math 11 class will become a three-person math 12 class).

I got evaluated last week. It went well. The class was a bit chaotic though. The day before, there was a fish farm forum in the school library that the kids attended. They got quite riled up about it, so I thought I could use that interest in my math class. We were study survey design, so I thought we could do an example with this. I planned it, and it turned out smooth as gold. So that went well. The surprises came at the beginning of class. The class was first thing in the morning. I ran into a new teacher that just got hired last week and he's a biologist and he was quite interested in the fish farm debate. I mentioned we were going to look at it from a survey design aspect. He seemed quite interested so I invited him to my class. Hey, what's one more person, right! Now, sometimes one kid is late. It's not always the same kid. So class starts and over half my class is not there! I was floored. They knew we were being observed. I laughed nervously, and then started the class. So the kids start showing up after about ten minutes ... and they all show us with no pencil. Grrr! I handled it well. And the observer said I did well in general. Phew! Only one more observation to go after spring break.

The power went out today. Fun, fun, fun. I freaked out because my stove beeped at me about 2 minutes after the power went out, and I get a little scared when I'm in the dark. Anyway, I got out the candles and lit them. All the time I was cursing myself that I procrastinated all day, and all the stuff I really needed to do, needed to be done on the computer. Anyway, I'm reading a script for my drama club (I started a drama club for the school) and the power comes on. So I go to blow out the candles. I blew really hard on them so that they'd totally extinguish so that the residual smoke wouldn't set the smoke alarm off. Well, I must of put my face too close to the candle because the next thing I know, I have wax all in my bangs, my forehead and my glasses. I was lucky to be wearing glasses. I went to the bathroom to get the wax off my face and my bangs were sticking straight up with wax on them. It was pretty funny. I wish I had taken a picture.

Sad news this weekend: one of the high school student's mom died from AIDS. I feel kinda bad. I don't teach the kid (but I will starting in two weeks), but all the teachers know him because he is quite mischievous. I can't imagine losing my mom. This affects me because my buddy, Andrew, feels like he foresaw it. He has a dream that he had big lice in his hair (I think because he just got dreads and his head is a bit itchy because he can only wash his hair once a week for the first little bit until the dreads become more dreadlocked) and one of the village elders told him that the dream means that someone close to him will die if he doesn't tell four people about his dream. He didn't think too much about it until he found out the news. The woman was his next door neighbour. I talked to Andrew about it and he's doing alright. He's a bit torn about not following the superstition. I tried to comfort him in saying that that is all it was and he certainly couldn't have prevented this death from happening. It will be a real interesting day at school tomorrow. I think my hugging muscle will get a good workout.

Success

2007-01-16T17:14:00.000-08:00

I saw this poem at school and it really spoke to me.

What is Success?

To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by
a healthy child, a garden patch
or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed
easier because you have lived;

This is to have succeeded.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Over Christmas, I asked a friend if he died today, would he have been happy with his life? He said no. I thought about it, and I feel I would. Not that I want to die any time soon. But I feel like I've lived a good life that has been fulfilling. I hope to live my life like this poem, and I think I've done a pretty good job so far.

Practical Jokes

2007-01-15T17:38:00.000-08:00

At M's mom's birthday party, I got a little gift. This gift had come up at the last party I was at with M's family. At first when I saw it, I wasn't sure what it was when I saw it from the back. I noticed people laughing when they saw it from the front and I noticed M was dying in her seat. And then I was shown what the big deal is.

I made some comment that M should not bring that to school because I'd be forced to confiscate it and take it to the VP's office. Of course we all laughed because we don't know who'd be more embarrassed, me or the VP.

The teacher's I hang with at school have sick senses of humor. They've been able to make sly jokes that the students don't catch. For example, there is a married couple that teach at the school. The husband stood outside his wife's classroom and made the "open the box" gesture from Dick in a Box. I don't think I can pull this off because I'm not subtle enough.

So now I'm stuck with this bull and I don't know what to do with it. I am determined to pass it on as a joke ... but I'm thinking school may not be the place to do it!!!

The Set-up

2007-01-14T14:48:00.000-08:00

Let’s start from the beginning. I have a student, M, and she’s pretty cool. In fact, we’ve become friends, well, as close to a friend that I feel comfortable with with a student. This is pretty funny because I’ve been telling myself that I am not my students’ friend, I am their teacher.

I’m a bit hesitant to be friends with students because of their maturity level, not exactly up to par with people my age. Also, it will always have that power undertone where I am their “superior”. There is also the safety factor. The teaching governing body is very clear about the power relationship between student and teacher and how impressionable students are with that. I know most of this is based around teachers dating students (which is not ok in my books) but I still want to be careful to protect myself. There’s also the issue of “teacher’s pet”. In all fairness, M is in my class of two students and I have a great student/teacher relationship with the other student.

I’ve thought a lot about not encouraging a friendship with a student, but I decided I should just go for it. It’s not like we are going to hang-out all the time, or discuss our love lives. The culture around here also doesn’t make a big deal out of it. Teachers fit in better here when they make the effort to be a part of the community. One way to do this is to be into basketball. I’m not. Some of the more established white teachers have actually been adopted by families in the community. So, I honestly think a friendship with a student and their family is a good thing.

But again, that gain for me is definitely not why I’m friends with M. She reminds me a little of myself when I was her age. She helped me dye my hair with Andrew, where I gave her my MSN info to get ahold of me. We’ve chatted on line about things, like Christmas news, and I’ll MSN her when she’s not in class to get the scoop. I like her and I think we will be “real” friends when she graduates from high school.

Anyway, M found me on MSN while I was still in the big city and started chatting with me. I let her know I was returning to the village the next day. It happened to be her birthday and she was having a family party and invited me. I was quite happy to attend because it would be neat to spend an evening with her to meet her family. Plus, a free meal when returning home to an empty fridge is also a plus!

The party was pretty fun. The family and I got alone very well and we were joking around with each other. M and I chatted afterward and she was a little apologetic for her “crazy” family. This made me laugh because every teenager thinks that their family is crazy. Come on, my step-dad alone mortified me enough as a teenager to make me empathize with any teenager. The rest of my family have their quirks as well (but I love them all to death). Her family was great, they liked to embarrass her a little, since it was her birthday and all. Afterward, she told me her family enjoyed having me. I reciprocated the compliment. I got along well best with M’s mom and her “brothers”. M is technically an only child, but she was raised with her two cousins whom she considers her brothers. Her mom reminds me a little of my mom. They’re both strong, little mamas, with wicked senses of humor.

A couple days later, M’s family was going to the restaurant in the neighboring village (accessible by boat) and she invited me along with the insistence of her mom. I was feeling crappy that day, so I declined. Well, last night was M’s mom’s birthday and I was invited to that. I was quite honored to be thought of for an invite, so I accepted.

We were chatting a little on-line about who was going to be there, and I was asking a million questions like the names of family members. I remember what they all look like but I could only remember some of their names. I felt more confident knowing everyone’s name.

The party was at one of M’s brother’s house. He lives with his lovely wife, Dawn, and her daughter. Dawn made delicious pizza for dinner. During pizza we were all chatting and normal conversation, and M’s mom turned to me and told me M’s other brother, Ian, would be coming later. I thought it a bit strange that she directed this particular comment to me, when really, the conversation wasn’t really on him. It then it dawned on me. Was I being set-up? Hmmm.

The culture here has a particular sense of humor where you kinda pick on someone and joke around that way. I’ve caught on quickly to this type of humor. I think this has definitely helped me succeed in winning the students over in the classroom. So Ian gets there, and starts in on me, giving me a hard time, and seeing if I’d roll with the punches. He even started calling me his girlfriend, to try to rile me up. Of course I can sense M is just dying in her seat from all this, but I handled it well. I know the family was testing me to see if I had a sense of humor and also poking fun at my outsiderness to see if I’m a fake person. I’m not expressing quite what I want to here, but I think you all know what I mean. I passed that test with flying colors.

After a while, Ian let up and started talking with me normally. The family were asking me questions about my life and were trying to get to know me. That was quite nice, because there’s only so much I can say about teaching without boring them all to death. It was also nice they were warming up to me on not such a superficial level. I even think Ian was flirting with me a little, patting my arm every time he talked to me, etc.

Anyway, it was time to come home and Ian walked M and I home. I live across the field from M so they walked me home. At this point, I was starting to get Ian back for giving me such a hard time. It was a good evening.

So I get home, and check my email, etc. and M comes online. I thanked her for the invite etc. and we’re talking about her family a bit and how great I think they are and then she drops the bomb I was waiting for.

“So, what do you think of Ian?”

I had to think about this one, and quick. I don’t want to say anything bad about a person’s brother because that’s just mean. Not that I had anything bad to say about him. I said he seems nice (I didn’t want to use the word guy). Also, I don’t want to play games with M in the middle, so I asked her why she asked.

Her response: “Ah, no reason.”

Ok, I don’t know how I feel being set-up with my student’s brother, by my student. There are a couple of issues here. The first being the situation where she’s playing matchmaker. I don’t know if this is the case and I really hope not. It’s one thing if he has an interest and is asking her for information. It’s another, if she wants to set us up from he own volition. That could be very disastrous if she has her heart set on us being together and we don’t go for it. I would hate for personal stuff to get in the way of our teacher/student relationship because I still have to be her teacher until June. Just another reason why you shouldn’t be friends with your teacher.
The other big issue is not having her in the middle. That being Ian or I playing games with each other through M. That can be very confusing for her and I’d never want to put her in that position.

Anyone have any advice here? My main strategy in this situation is to make it clear that I don’t want M in the middle if she brings up the subject again. I’ll tell her that Ian knows where to find me if he wants to talk to me and I don’t want M to be the messenger.

New Boundaries

2007-01-13T10:54:00.000-08:00

Ok, I said I'd never do this but I'm going to. Post a full on picture of myself. It's way too identifying. But what the hell, I guess I can live it down if people in the community find out.

So here it is. It was "bad Hair Day" at school. About once a month, the leadership class plans a theme day. I usually participate because I like to show I have school spirit. Here is what I did.

I felt a bit foolish at first because none of the other staff did their hair "badly". Some wore hats because that is what you'd do to hide said bad hair, and some just put their hair in a pony tail because, again, that's what one does when one has bad hair. A couple of kids (mostly in the elementary school) had crazy hair like mine.

The best part was, surprisingly, I got a lot of respect from staff and students for doing my hair like this. And the strangest part of all was that I got respect from people being able to laugh at me.

My New Years

2007-01-13T09:56:00.000-08:00

Ok, I know it was almost two weeks ago, but I finally got around to blogging about it.

I had one of the most perfect New Year's Eves in my life. It definitely ranks among the top 3. What I find interesting, is that it wasn't anything too special or out-of-the-ordinary. Maybe that's why I liked it so much.

It started off pretty good. I was my second day in the Big City and Matt and I decided to go for a jog. I had bought some new jogging clothes in my home town and I was dying to try them out ... you know ... to see if that wicking technology actually worked. He kept telling me that he didn't really run on the track. I kept telling him that I jog pretty slow and I'm sure he'd keep up. Well, he did so well, he lapped me! I found that quite funny. The clothes were quite effective. They passed my grueling inspection and are way better than a pair of hand me down stretch pants and a long sleeved t-shirt.

We got back to his place and I was fussing with my suitcase, shuffling things about and thinking about what I'd do that day. Matt's friends invited us to play poker. I had never played poker. I was in, it sounded like fun. There was a $20 buy in. Hmmm, I got nervous about that, but Matt convinced me it was all good. He then told me I had 30 minutes to get ready. I just laughed. Yeah, right, half an hour to shower, dress, do my hair, etc. for New Year's Eve. He must be kidding. He wasn't. I did it. I didn't get to really do my hair. But that was OK.

I think I looked pretty hot that night. I had on this royal blue, satin shirt with my hot jeans. I remember feeling soft and flirty.

We went and played poker. I, of course, did terribly. It was almost embarrassing. I was first out. But I had lots of fun. I got to sit in this really sweet chair. It was leather and it rocked (as in moved).

From there we went to a house party. I had such a great time at the house party. It was a total sausage party, so that made things interesting. I was the new girl that nobody knew so I had some great conversations. The other three girls at the party were super nice. We engaged in some fun small talk. I guess the party was nothing so special, per say, but I just had a lot of fun. Some of the highlights include, playing foozeball and losing harshly (I was not having a good game winning day!), drinking more than one drink and being able to function well, the Christmas tree fight, getting caught in a slightly compromising position and being able to laugh about it, and the crazy cleany-magnet thing on the fish tank.

I remember being hungry all day because all had that day was coffee and a bowl of cereal until we were on our way to the party ... where I got a sandwich at a 24-hour convenience store. Pizza was ordered at the party and someone made a face made of toppings.

So the party's wrapping up, and Matt and I need to catch a bus or a taxi. Well, we managed to miss the last bus and trying to get through to a taxi company was difficult. We finally got through only to be told that we'd have to wait about and hour for a taxi. The operator told Matt that if we saw an empty taxi, we should just jump in the window! About 10 seconds later, this taxi was driving by and Matt just walks into the street trying to flag it. We got the taxi ... my hero!

I just remember being in the taxi, feeling great that I had such a good night. Matt was being super sweet too. I'll remember that moment as me being so peaceful and happy.

It was great to have such a lovely night, because other parts of my vacation were quite difficult.

Coffee with Toccata

2007-01-11T16:20:00.000-08:00

Toccata and I managed to get into better touch because of blogging. Awwwwe, isn’t that nice? Anyway, we decided to get together since I was going to be in her neighbourhood over the holidays ... literally.
I got to see her place (I hope she doesn’t mind me writing about it) finally. We’ve only known each other for like ... my good, around 9 years now (we attended the same community college in ’97, but I don’t think we really met until about ’98) and I haven’t seen her place ever. Now, I’m off topic with our knowing each other so long, but I forget, Toccata, did you have Norm for 101? Were you in that class with me?
Anyway, I loved her place. It’s so neat and tidy for one. She had it all decorated festive with her tiny, little tree and her Christmas lights on the banister and in her sitting room. She has the awesomest cookware too. It’s so retro ... and orange. I love it! We even discussed how we “inherited” our cast iron pans.
We initially wanted to meet up with our university four, but E was out of town. Luckily, K was able to come. We went on a scenic walk to Starbucks in the village, complete with a walk-by of the cemetery. I didn’t get any pictures of all the trees down, opps.
We went to Starbucks. My god, I miss Starbucks! I know it’s a giant corporation and their coffee is bitter, etc. but man, three words: Egg Nog Latte. Mmm, mm. It was almost as good as a caramel frappichino on a hot summer day. Toccata likes her tall coffee in a grande cup.

Us being girls, we managed to talk, talk, talk for hours on end. We got together at 11:00 and we were still gabbing away when we parted at 3:30. We had a good time. I don’t know about you, but nothing beats getting together with old friends and catching up.

Still Waiting ...

2007-01-09T18:11:00.000-08:00

I can't get inspired to write until the stories in my head are out. And those stories are dependent on the pictures I have on my camera. And those can't get posted until I get my camera cord.

But to appease my readers, I am posting this song. Sorry, you can only listen to it if you have itunes (I think).

The line of this song, "Don't be so cold when you kiss me" keeps running though my head. Don't ask why because I can't tell you.

I'm getting use to being back in school. My next evaluation is next week and I'm getting anxious. I want to be observed in my math 10 class, but this week they've been really off task. I'm scared they will behave this was next week, which may reflect bad on me ... because maybe I'm "letting" them act off task. My plan is to crack the whip on them Thursday and let them know how I feel and what the situation is. Hopefully, they'll be really good because they like me and they've been saying how much they look forward to being in my class next year.

New Year's Resolutions

2007-01-06T20:34:00.000-08:00

Ok, I know. I'm like 6 days late. But I wanted to come up with something good... and accomplishable. Here's what I came up with.

1. Get my teeth fixed. This has always been a dream of mine. And now that I have dental coverage and money for cosmetic stuff, I'm going to get them done. There is no dentist up here so I have to wait for the summer. The big thing now, is that one of my front teeth died a couple of years ago, and it's starting to show. The tooth has gotten more noticeable yellow, and in black lights (and the light reflected off my computer) the tooth is black. Eww! I'm also going to get braces. That means I'll start to get IDed more in bars and liquor stores. It will be a sacrifice I'm willing to take.

2. Stop being jealous. I've never thought of myself being jealous before. I'm a loyal friend and I am always happy for my friends when good things happen to them. But this only applies to friends. People I don't know, or hardly know... all bets are off. I am one green-eyed monster. I've realized this is a deterrent to me making friends. I've made friends over the last few years (and months) but only with people I'm not in competition (or what I believe to be competition) with. This is a lesson I learned from F. I don't like blaming others for my problems, because I believe my choices and my destiny are my own and I choose how they turn out. But, I think this jealously came from my relationship with Asshole. He was very possessive of me, and his influence wore off on me. It's strange because I was never jealous of other woman around him, but after him, I was a jealous person. I think jealously stems from insecurity, which is a hard thing from me to admit about myself. Maybe the underlining goal should be to be more secure.

3. Not everyone is my student ... so don't treat everyone that way. Enough said.

4. Don't be such a homebody. I need to get out more. It's a bit more of a challenge here, but I can try to practice for my summer back in the city.

That's all I can think of now. I think this will give me plenty to work with this year.

What to start with ...

2007-01-04T21:49:00.000-08:00

I'm back in the small town ... three days early. But that's OK. I have a ton of stories that I don't know here to start.

I managed to only forget three things in my voyages all over mid-sized towns and big cities. One being the cable to connect my camera to my computer. So at least three blog entries will have to b postponed while I wait for that to be shipped up. Another thing I forgot was that I'm trying to cut down on swearing. That has happened.

Christmas was lovely. I got some pretty nice things, which made me feel all the worse because only one of my presents was present on Christmas morning. Oh, well. Everyone got a cool present. My mom's present was going to a super nice french restaurant. My sister's present was us going for a bikini wax. To each their own.

Next it was to go to the big city to visit my friends. I had been looking forward to this time since I left the city in late August. I had such an enchanted time there this summer with everything going my way, I was hoping that the magic would continue. It didn't. This was hard. I kind of think of it as how Odysseus felt when he returned back to Ithica after the crusades. It just wasn't the same.

By no means do I want to complain because I had a really good time in Vancouver ... most of the time. I stayed with Matt. He was a great host. I enjoyed my time with him immensely. But some of the magic was gone from this summer. I know he had a rough semester in school and I had a life-movement change, so that factored in. I feel we had some great times and conversations, but I thought all my time spent with him would be like that. That's a no brainer, I was setting myself up for disappointment, in that aspect. I don't want this to discount the fact that I enjoyed his company tremendously.

I got to spend the first part of my last evening with Brilliant. We went to a local pub, watch some hockey and had some beer. It was great to see him doing well. After the pub, we dropped in on a guy we met this summer who still lives in dorms.

I didn't get to see any of my education buddies, which was disappointing. Actually, I didn't get to see many of my friends there. It just reinforced the theme that this summer was truly enchanted and I won't get to relive it again. I'm fine with that now. But on January 1st, I was extremely frustrated about it ... as you could tell in my previous entry.

All the fun stories will be developed more over the next few days when i get time to record them, and when I get my camera cord back... because I took specific pictures for the blog!

So with that I'll start with some stories as separate entries ....

In 2007 ...

2007-01-02T19:58:00.000-08:00

Just a quick blog to say I'm still alive. I'm in the BIG city right now... visiting. There have been many ups and downs ... which I will blog about in the coming days.

I've done some good thinking too. Every moment here, I'm confused on what my next move should be. I'm having a very poker time here.

Wish me luck for the next few days. I may return to home a more broken or more fixed. We'll see.

The Trip of a Puke Time

2006-12-27T19:33:00.000-08:00

I'm finally home!

The ferry was only 26 hours late. But I made it home. It was quite a trip.

Everything started off fine. Well...

I set my alarm for 4:45 am to get up for a shower, etc. I couldn't sleep though and was awake at 3:30. You have to be at the ferry terminal 90 to 120 minutes before the sailing. We got an update the night before saying the ferry would depart at 8:45 am so this was a good time.

Well, I checked the update that morning and the ferry was delayed another 2 hours. So I was up early. Ok. I'll watch some TV.

What was I going to find on TV at 5:00am on a Sunday? Church TV! Wow, was I surprised when I stopped on channel 7 to find HARD CORE PORN! Ahh! That was not what I needed to see. I'm thinking the band council should look into that because as much as I like to watch porn (roll eyes here), I'm sure parents don't want their early risers to watch it. The crazy thing was that when the porn ended, the next movie that was on was one aimed at kids! I ate my oatmeal giggling about what I saw.

Ms. So-and-so and I got to the ferry terminal the required 90 to 120 minutes before the sailing. We were the first ones there. That was OK because we just rocked out to some old tunes in her truck, screaming the lyrics and being excited that we were going home. The tunes included, Paradise City by Guns 'n Roses, The Happy Days theme song, and some Offspring.

We actually left the terminal 15 minutes before the scheduled time (always a bonus)(and don't worry, no one missed the ferry from the early departure because everyone gets reservations and everyone was accounted for). We went for breakfast first. I had gross eggs, sausage and a hashbrowns along with some naturalpath seasick medication.

The first hour and a half was fine. This is the usual amount of time I spend of ferries. This trip was to be 7 hours. Well, after the first hour and a half I started to feel a little queasy. So I took some more pills. They didn't work. Next time I'm getting heavy duty Gravol. For the next five hours, I barfed my brains out. I managed to puke in puke friendly places like, my hand (no spillage), the toilet, a trash can, overboard, and in provided barf bags.

I was exhausted. The last hour of the voyage was the worse. That is where we are in the most open water and the weather was starting to act up. An announcement came on that we were going to try to cross the channel but we may have to turn back and anchor to wait out the storm if it was too turbulant. I was ready to die. At this point I was only puking up bile and I couldn't stand to do that for how ever long we may have to dock.

Luckily, we made it across. I started to feel better when we were five minutes away from the dock. I felt fine enough to hug all my co-workers and wish them a Merry Christmas. I was actually surprised they hugged me, not being scared of my pukey self. But apparently, I didn't smell like it.

The drive from the ferry to home was another 7 hours. But I made it home at exactly 12:01 am on December 25th. Merry Christmas to me!

FUCK!!!

2006-12-23T12:07:00.000-08:00

This being my 100th post, I was hoping it would be something profound. But I'm so distracted because the ferry to get me home is delayed by at least 25 hours. First it was 10 hours, then 20, then 22, now 25. And the weather report says there will be another storm while we are on our way to the final destination. So we may anchor somewhere to wait it out on the way home.

FUCK!!! FUCK!!!

Here's a picture to distract you guys. We get barges going by and they interest me. I don't know why. Maybe because, as a city dweller, I'm use to seeing tertiary industry, not primary. Nothing like seeing some resources that made this country.

Fire Place Channel

2006-12-21T18:45:00.000-08:00

When I first saw it, I thought it was crazy! Who would want to watch a fire on TV. It's nutty! Why not watch a real fire ... or watch The OC or something.

I mentioned it to my parents, and they were like, "We love that channel! We watch it all the time." I was shocked. My parents are pretty funky people, so I would never think they'd watch it.

There are different fire place channels. Some play Christmas tunes. Some roar like a fire and crackle and everything.

I like the idea now. I actually watched it two years ago when I lived with my bro and his girlfriend. We had it on when we opened presents.

I just saw a commercial for it yesterday. On Fox Rochester, it's called The Yule Log. It will be on Christmas morning.

I'm wondering other uses for it. I imagine people who don't have fire places, they can leave it on so Santa can come to their house through it. Cool!

I've been rated!

2006-12-20T18:01:00.000-08:00

First off, it's nice to see blogger is out of the beta stage ... I hope that keep the site from being so cranky!

Ok, so when I was in university, there was (still is!) this site called rate my professor where you can do just that. I did.

Well, there is one called rate my teacher. I had to see if I was on it. I am. I have one rating.
It says I'm sarcastic and a wanna be gangster.

Hahaha! It made me laugh. I feel bad if I come across as sarcastic. I have to watch that one. But the gangster makes me laugh. I guess I could be preceved as that. I say "gangster" words like "word" and "sup" and "sweet" but I say them with a nerdy undertone. I say them to be silly ... because as a white chick, they sound kinda funny coming out of my mouth. I didn't realize it could be interpreted that I want to be a gangster (that's gangsta, to you be-otch).

I know I shouldn't take these things personal, and I don't. Kids have said worse things to my face. It's just interesting to find out what kids think about you behind your back. In all fairness, the kid went on to say I'm nice and I'm a good teacher.

Almost time for home

2006-12-19T16:32:00.000-08:00

In just four days I'll be going home! I'm almost beside myself with glee! I can't wait. It's all I think about ... hence why I haven't blogged lately. Because all I can think about is going home.
So to distract you guys, here is a picture from last weekend. This is from my balcony.

Yes, envy me.

Celebrities I look like

2006-12-17T10:54:00.000-08:00

I got this idea from Kelly's Website.

I did it twice. Here was my first result.

Here is my second result.

I think Donny Osmond is the funniest match. I love that I have Margaret Cho because she is so F***ing funny. I think I totally look like Mandy Moore and Valaria Mazza. Hahaha! Bic Runga has such a nice voice too.

It's funny because I've been told I look like Gwen Stephani or Reese Witherspoon the most.

Too much yet nothing at all

2006-12-16T13:35:00.000-08:00

We had our Christmas concert last night. It seemed to go well. The concert committee decided to try something new this year by having the concert in the school gym (instead of the community hall). The other big change was that each class (elementary, of course) would be in their classroom until a runner would come and fetch them to perform. This is a common way Christmas concerts are conducted across the entire North American continent. But a lot of people were bitching about the change before they even saw it. My students were expressing their parents' complaints to me all week. All I said was that they should check out the new format before they start saying "it sucks".

Like I said, the "new way" seemed successful from what I could see. At the end of the concert, I was standing with the VP while parents and community members shook his hand and told him they liked the concert ... including one of the biggest advocates against the new format.

My job during the concert was to help out in a grade 2 classroom. This was fun. Kids that age are so great, especially when you're a guest in their classroom. I was novel so they liked playing with me (of course I played with blocks and pegs to make mathematical patterns). I even read to two girls ... while one of them had her arms around my neck, hanging off my back, her head pressed against my ear so I could only hear my voice rattle around in my head. The girls then braided my hair for me.

My other job was in the staff performance. I signed up for it hoping someone else would organize it. No one did, and damned if I wasn't going to be in the Christmas concert. So I took the reigns and ask Ms. So-and-so if she would join me in organizing our performance. We got a spoof poem of Twas' the Night Before Christmas titled Twas' the Week Before Christmas. It was about how a teacher goes nuts because her kids are bouncing off the walls. I read the poem while other staff pretended to be obnoxious students. It was really funny. The kids LOVED it during dress rehearsal and the community laughed pretty hard too.

The thing that got my got happened during the second meeting Ms. So-and-so and I called for the performance. Everyone agreed they loved our idea and were pretty excited because we knew the kids would think it funny. Once the meeting was over, one of our co-workers had the gall to tell us that we should do something serious because the kids don't take us seriously enough. She then added we should do something more traditional having to do with the true meaning of Christmas: Jesus.

First off, I'm serious all the time with the kids. True, we have a lot of fun in class (well, as much fun as you can have in a math class) but there is usually a pretty serious tone in class. Math is serious stuff. It would be nice for the kids to see us in a silly role for the Christmas concert. Second, the whole Jesus-Christmas-thing is pretty much avoided in the public school system. If you don't get what I mean, I can go into it further, but I'm sure most of you know what I mean. Thirdly, we all know the crap that First Nations have gone through with the church: residential schools, colonization, small pox, etc. As a new person to the community, I certainly don't want to open that can of worms. Fourthly, I'm not Christian. Since I was the one who stepped up to the plate I got to pick what we did :P

I was pretty speechless when she said this. And pretty ticked. So was Ms. So-and-so. We pretty much said that it was pretty much organised now and we weren't going to come up with something new with three days to the concert. Also, I said school was not the place to push religion onto people. Ms. So-and-so, bless her for not being a chicken like me, out-and-out said that she would not be part of some "traditional" performance. And we told her if she wanted to do something that was more traditional, she was welcome to organize something herself. She didn't take that suggestion up and she stayed firm with her opinion. She just wanted to bitch about what we were doing. We were glad when she opted not to be in the performance.

I've been wanting to put this in my blog for awhile to get it off my chest, but I'm not quite sure how I feel. So I'm sneaking it into the end of a long entry. I think I have a crush on one of my co-workers. But it's a bit complicated. The big issue is that he's 20 and I'm 27. I think I'm too old for him. Second, some of his closest friends are students – students that I teach. Thirdly, guess what his name is? Andrew. How strange is that if we dated? I would have dated three Andrews in a row. I think he may have a crush on me too. He was taking photos of the concert and stuff yesterday but it seemed he was taking a disproportionate number of pictures of me. At one point I said he could only take pictures of me if he were in them too. So he handed off the camera to some kid, wrapped his arm around me and had the kid take a couple of pictures of us. Again, I'm wondering if this is a disaster ready to happen with the complications, or is it that I'm a little lonely and I'm attaching myself to people who show interest in me. I think my trip home next week will give me the perspective I need to deal with this situation.

I'm going straight to hell for this one ...

2006-12-12T17:30:00.000-08:00

I took my literacy class for a walk the other day. I know what you are asking yourself. "Why are you, Ms. Small Town, teaching literacy as a math teacher?" Answer: Because all the teachers do.

Anyway, we were walking by the new totem pole. It is very nice. One student says to the class, "Hey, doesn't it look like that face is going down on that frog?"

I couldn't help but laugh my ass off. Inappropriate? Definitely. A little bit true? Yes, a little.

Is it disrespectful that I laughed and still think it's funny? I told some of my fellow teachers, and they can't help but think that when they look at the pole.

Oh Christmas tree

2006-12-11T19:15:00.000-08:00

Here is it. This year's tree.

I don't own a tree stand. So I improvised one out of my bathroom trash can, and some large rocks found on the school grounds.

It took a while to get the tree up and then it almost feel over when I was putting decorations on it. Good thing my head was in the way when that happened. That, of course, caused this year casualty.

I love glass decorations. Too bad the dinning room table doesn't share my sentiment.

I love my tree. It makes me happy.

Out of Popular demand ...

2006-12-09T23:06:00.000-08:00

So every year that I've lived on my own (except living in res becaue it was BANNED to have a live tree) , I've gotten a Christmas tree some way or another. My first one was pretty funny. I lived with my boyfriend and we were spending our first Christmas away from our parents' homes. We were both students so didn't have much money. I wanted a little something and I saw this evergreen branch on the ground (how pitiful is that!), took it home, put it into a mug of water and tacked the top of it to the wall. I wanted something to put the presents "under" ... but it was more like in front of. It was ridiculous to look at too. It had eight decoration on it that I "bought" at Canadian Tire with Canadian Tire money.

My second tree (and all the ones since) came from Asshole's "back yard". He lived in a Strata and every year, we would go out and find a tree and saw it down. Of course, we would do this late at night ... because it wasn't exactly legal ... but it wasn't outright illegal either. Most of these tree were quite Charlie Brown-esque. But I loved ever single one of them. In fact, with the first one, I took a little Polaroid of and would keep on my desk during my final exams. I still have the picture in my wallet.

Here's my tree for two different years. It's funny because the candy cane on the wall
stayed there ALL year. You gotta love me in the sweatpants too. Soo attractive! I
look much better now. Ha! I would have scanned in the pictures but I don't have a
cord to hook up the scanner to the computer yet.

Ok, but here is what everyone wanted to hear about. My last tree from Asshole was in this cute attic apartment I lived in. It was three stories up ... a steep flight of stairs too. The tree made a little mess coming in the apartment, like most live trees do.

Well, Chirstmas came and went and the decorations came off (around the 2nd of January). The tree was still standing. Around mid-January it was time to get rid of this thing. The closest mall was having a tree recycling day so I wanted to take the tree to that (the funny thing is that I carried the tree to the mall). Anyway, the tree was very dry. You'd look at this thing funny and it would shed a zillion needles on the floor. It would have made a giant mess hauling this thing across the apartment to the stair case and down the steep stairs.

I'm a problem solver, as a math person. The tree happened to be in front of a big window that happened to have the capability to open. So I called my roommate over, we open the window and chuck the tree out. We had to really give it the ol' heave-ho or else it wouldn't have cleared the roof and then one of us would have had to climb out the window after the tree to push it off the roof. Good thing it didn't come to that. It was great! We had very little to clean-up and it was a great way to get out some angst. We had so much fun doing it, we were almost tempted to go get it, bring it back up and throw it out again.

The end of the story is that we threw it so hard, it almost landed in the neighbours yard. That would have been interesting to explain to the neighbours: how our Christmas tree made it over their 10 foot fence.

I hope that didn't disappoint anyone. I can image some of you were thinking I lost it with the tree and threw it out the window, decorations and all. I'm not a barbarian, you know!

Welcome to the world of wireless internet!

2006-12-09T13:31:00.000-08:00

I'm a genius! Ok, I'm not really, but I'm pretty damned smart! Dad sent me a wireless card and I installed it into my computer today ... all by myself!

I love Macs, they make it so easy. I think I've only installed like 3 pieces of hardware into my computer by myself and I'm always so pleased.

Now what I'm wondering is, whose network am I? I just choose one that my card picked up. I thought I was choosing the one the school is on ... because all teachers are allowed to do that from home. But the school one is censored (I'll blog about my opinion on that soon) and right now I currently have access to some of the censored sites.

Hahaha! Whose network am I on. Maybe I'll never find out ... or I will because someone will tell me to get off it!

Staff Party

2006-12-08T20:45:00.000-08:00

Tonight was our staff Christmas part, put on by the school board. It was lots of fun. We had a nice turkey dinner with all the trimmings.

The best part was the dollar auction. Everyone on staff donated an item. I donated a flash drive. It was pretty nice, it matched my blazer (see picture). You could buy one ticket for a dollar. Items were grouped with other items, and the MC would announce what items were up. If you wanted something, you threw a ticket into a hat for the draw.

I won something too! Something I wanted badly! My package include some abalone earrings; a Christmas Disney t-shirt, extra large (pajamas now); a day planner and ... A REAL CHRISTMAS TREE delivered to my house. I also get to pick what size I want. I was ecstatic that I won! I LOVE Christmas trees. I was sad that I wouldn't get one this year. And now I have one. Here's me all happy.

Fortune Soap

2006-12-05T16:33:00.000-08:00

I got some fortune cookie soap as a gift two Christmas ago. I finally decided to use it because it was cool.

It took me two whole months to use up enough of it to get the fortune out.

Here is what it said.

It's time to take care of your dept.
A future opportunity will be missed if you don't.

What the f*** does that mean? Is "dept." a typo? Should it say debt? I am taking care of my debt! The only debt I have is student loans. I'm awesome at paying my credit card bill ... but then my limit is only $500. A future opportunity?!? Oh no, I won't be able to finance a car ... that I can't drive because I have no licence (by choice, by the way). Oh no, I can't buy a house. Too bad since I currently live on an Indian Reserve where I couldn't buy a house anyway because I don't have the right ethnic parents.

Does "dept." stand for department? I'm the head of my department! If you want to call it that. I'm the math expert in the school. Maybe I need to whip the other math teachers into shape? That would go over well. Not only am I new to the community, I'm also brand new to the profession. Wouldn't teachers who've been teaching since I was in high school love to see me "take care" of them.

Maybe "dept." stands for dependant. That would suck because then the fortune would be useless for me because I have no dependants.

This fortune soap sucked ... except it gave me a blogging topic. With that said, I can't wait to see what my next fortune will be. I'll keep you all posted. It should come out in about February or March.

Stinky bag

2006-12-04T16:39:00.000-08:00

I have this student who leaves her bag in my classroom because the students at our school only have those half lockers. I'm fine with that except she goes super nuts with this perfume spray she has and her bag wreaks of the stuff. The worse thing is that I have the same scent in my collection. Needless to say, I will never wear it in this community for fear of people telling me I'm copying a student's signature scent.

It turns out the students in my HCE 8 class actually learned something! They are raving about how much they didn't "like" learning about STIs. God, I hope they didn't. But they've actually retained the information. they are currently trying to scare my current students with all the awful things they learned about, like the symptoms of syphilis and the difference between gonorrhea and chlamydia. I'm ecstatic that they learned this stuff! Am I a little perverse in my excitement about learning?

Lesson learned

2006-12-03T11:47:00.000-08:00

I finally realized the lesson I was suppose to learn from Femina. It is to listen.
I believe people come into our lives for a reason. Especially ones we choose to interact with. I think we can learn a life lesson from everyone we interact with. I've thought about this with people I met this summer, especially because I know I would only be with them for a short time.

Out of respect for myself, and others I have choosen to erase this post. Thank you Femina, for all that you have done for me.

Unpacking

2006-12-02T17:28:00.000-08:00

I finally got the last 14 boxes that Dad sent up It was like a mini-Christmas. I was excited to have my books, my winter clothes and my fancy kitchen stuff back. I can't beliveve how much better it is to do dishes with a dish rack! I've also gotten use to having to wait like 20 minutes to heat up food that the microwave is not taken for granted anymore. It is thanked profusely daily! I also got some bonuses like Nutella and this awesome printer/scanner/photocopier.

I've been quite reluctant to unpack though. Here is the current state of my spare bedroom.

It looks like a packing supply factory threw up in there. I'm usually really keen on unpack, but with this move it's taken me sometime. I'm wondering why that is? I have the space to unpack stuff (unlike my cramped dorm room this summer). I'm pretty darn sure I want to stick around here for a couple years.

Maybe I'm just sick of the packing-moving-unpacking cycle. I've moved at least once a year for the last four years (I moved twice in one year for the last two years). Maybe I've gotten so use to spare looking living areas. Maybe I just need some insentive. I know that when my mom or sister or brother come to visit, I'll have to have the spare room in shape.

I am having fun popping some of the bubble wrap when I unpack a valuable though :)

Today was parent teacher interviews...

2006-12-01T20:08:00.000-08:00

And here is what the parents saw when they entered my room ...

Sometimes I still think it's weird that I'm a teacher. Like on my door for the interviews, it said my name. It's weird to see my name like that.

I met a few parents and they were all nice, thank god! But some of them I was tempted to give parenting advice to. Like, maybe you should ground your kid until they catch up on work ... or maybe you should make sure your kid's not on the internet until 3 am every night. But who the hell am I to give parenting advice. I'm no parent. Heck, I'm barely an adult. But it's funny how parents will give me teaching advice. Hmm....

P.S. Blogger has been a real be-otch lately. It took me three days to post this because of picture problems.

National Addiction Awareness Week

2006-11-30T19:02:00.000-08:00

It was Addiction Awareness Week at school this week. The kids were pretty forward in asking me questions. Perhaps it’s because I’m young and they can relate to me the most. Perhaps it’s because I’m new and they are testing me of what I’ll say. Perhaps it’s because I’m usual pretty honest and I’ve told them a little about my youth (I did bring in my yearbooks with the celebrity I went to school with and they saw pictures of me in high school). It could be a combination of these things.

This week I got asked a couple questions that were tricky. I also thought about what I’d do if kids asked me some hard questions. I want to be as honest as possible because a) I’m a terrible liar and b)I want to be as real as possible. There are also good ways to answer the questions that deflect a bad answer and get the kid thinking about something else.

I got asked if I’ve ever been drunk before. I answered yes ... because I have. Most of you know about puke-a-rama at New Year’s 2000. The kid asked me when. I said when I was young and stupid. Of course I’m not going to tell the story of the last time I was drunk.

I got asked if I ever bullied someone. I said yes. I said I help spread rumours about some people in high school. We’ve been studying bullying in HCE. Of course I didn’t tell them about how I’d make fun of this nerdy girl at school to behind her back and to her face.

No kid asked me if I’ve taken drugs. I had a good answer for that one (that I’ve used before). I answer yes. And the kid asks me what I’ve taken and I say Tylonol, Asperin, Ny Quil, and Cleritin. When I’ve given this answer kids usual just roll their eyes at me. I waiting for when a kid asks me if I’ve taken illegal drugs .. or ask if I’ve ever abuse drugs. The abuse one is easy. No... and the reason (which I won’t tell kids) is because I’ve tried a couple of drug and the experiences were awful so I’ll never try them again. I have an answer for the illegal drug question too. I tell them I don’t want to answer it and then I’ll say why. If I answer yes, the kid will probably change their opinion of me and I don’t want that. If I say no, then the kid may think I’m lying (which I will be) or may change their opinion of me. Either way, I don’t like the consequences.

Here is a question that I thought of that has stumped me on an answer. Why is it ok for adults to drink and not teenagers? There are the BS answers. Because it’s the law. Because you’re still growing and you need to be healthy. Because kids usually don’t act responsible with alcohol. But why is it ok for adults? A lot of adults don’t make the right decisions about alcohol. How many adults do you know drink and drive? I know a few. And it’s people my parents’ age that are the worst. People in their early 30s and under have been lectured to death about drinking and driving. And most adults I know buy alcohol to get drunk. True, most of the “adults” I know are quite young and still like to go to clubs and bars, but we’re not very responsible when it comes to alcohol. We drink to be stupid and get laid easier ... and get up the balls to sing Karaoke.

Maybe it’s ok because we truly understand the consequences of drinking. Hmm, do we really? I’ve done some stupid s*** while drunk, and it’s all been when I was legal drinking age. I was so paranoid of the bad things I heard about alcohol when I was younger, I was too scared to do anything the handful of times I drank under age. I understand (not just think I do) some of the consequences of drinking because I’ve been around this earth long enough to see them. I also know enough nurses/doctors/paramedic and police officers to hear the stories

So why is it OK for adults to drink and not teenagers? I don’t have a good answer for that. Is there a good answer that doesn’t make you look like an asshole hypocrite? Maybe if you are totally alcohol free you can get away with answering that question.

Arctic Air

2006-11-27T16:20:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning. Coincidentally, four minutes before my alarm would go off. Then I realized I didn't set it. I was feeling lucky that I was up in time for my morning jog. As I was putting my jogging stuff on, I was listening to the radio. The weather report was on.

My area has a northern arctic airflow warning. What does that mean? I understand what a rainfall warning or a snowfall warning is or even a tsunami warning. But I've never heard of a airflow warning. So after my jog, I trotted over to my computer to look that up.

Meteorologists classify frigid Northern Hemisphere air masses as Arctic when they are born north of the Arctic Circle. It is typified by extremely cold temperatures and very little moisture.

In the birth grounds of these air masses, the long, dark winter nights couple with clear skies and surfaces covered with snow and ice to continually chill the air. Little warming heat from the sun alleviates the cold. The surface snow and ice reflect away most of what little sun weakly beams down. To accentuate the lack of incoming heat, snow very effectively radiates away what little heat it has, thus dropping surface air temperatures until they reach the temperature of the high atmosphere.

The air masses build for some time in these frigid cradles, and the more time they spend in their deep-freeze birthing grounds, the cold and drier they become, chilling the air to bitter temperatures, often less than minus 40 ^oC/F. As a result of that extreme cold, arctic air masses have an extremely low water vapour content (absolute humidity). The low water vapour content further permits the loss of heat from the surface and the air above it because water vapour is a very effective greenhouse gas. The lower the water content, the more radiative heat is lost directly to space.

Eventually high-altitude winds catch the air masses and push them outward, usually toward the south and east as huge High pressure systems. This is strange because I'm in the west, not east.

I've seen evidence of this phenomena because all the moisture in the air is gone. It's wicked cold too. Talking to some students, they've commented it is not usual for it to be like this here. That's good to know because I'm freezing my ass off.

The temperature this morning, with windchill was - 18°C. Ouch! It will be like that overnight tonight.

At least it's not snowing.

Report Cards

2006-11-26T16:48:00.000-08:00

Sorry, I've been bad about blogging but it's report card time. What a pain to have to write a comment about each student and then add up all their grades. The grade software the school uses sucks crap (I spent a day trying to get it to do what I want but it wouldn't) so I've done all the grades by hand. I will write an excel program soon to do what I want to do for me.

I dyed my hair. I have some nice subtle highlights that one of my students help me with. I'll post pictures when I get my camera this week.

Jeopardy!

2006-11-22T18:28:00.000-08:00

Jeopardy! is a great game. I just noticed that the proper spelling when refering to the gameshow is Jeopardy! You need that exclamation point to clerify what you are talking about.

I love celebrity Jeopardy!. It always makes me feel so smart. I can usually answer 90% of the questions ... or I guess with jeopardy, it's give a question to all the answers.

Sometimes there's a really smart celebrity on too. Last night Michael McKean, who works often with Christopher Guest, was on. He totally kicked ass ... including beating the US secretary of education.

I love when I get final Jeopardy!. I feel like such a smarty. I don't care if they dumb down the questions for the celebrities, I still feel like the smartest person in the world when I get final Jeopardy!.

One of my brother's goals in life is to be a contestant on Jeopardy!. That is why I'd have him on my Family Feud team. I wish him all the luck.

I'm getting old

2006-11-21T16:13:00.001-08:00

I was writing the date on the board, like I do every morning and I wrote today's date: Nov. 21.

I like the 21st because I was born on the 21st. The 21st of June. So it was my 5 month b-day. And then I realized next month will be my half year birthday. And being a math teacher, I know if you have a half you would round up to a whole (as opposed to rounding down).

Then I thought ahead and realized... this time next month, by rounding up, I will be closer to 30 than I am to 25.

My god that is scary. I'm almost 30. That is some freaky shit. At least I don't look it :)

In other news, I've accidentally said "fuck" twice now in front of students. In school. While I was teaching. Thank god only three students have heard me.

It made me realize I have to go cold turkey on the swearing. I'm not doing such a hot job. I've sworn twice in this entry already. The crazy things is that I was swearing over the same student both times.

The first time I was marking tests in the independent learning class I "teach". When I mark, I'm really rooting for all the students to do well. Well, one kid made a stupid mistake and got the question wrong. I said the F-word because I really wanted him to get the answer right. Two students heard me here.

The second time was when I was looking out the window. I saw my student returning to school (to my class) with a hot chocolate from the store. He had asked to go to the store and I said no. That makes sense because he needed to do math, not go to the store. I'm also responsible for students while they are suppose to be in my class, so if anything happened to him, I could be held liable. Plus, the store merchants are not suppose to sell food to the kids during school hours. About 5 minutes later, he asked if he could go to the vending machine for a juice. I said yes to this because the vending machine is a 15 second walk from my classroom.

So I was pretty pissed to see he went to the store anyway because now I'd have to have "a talk" with him. So I said, "F***in' Hell". I didn't mean to say it out loud but it slipped. The student sitting closest to me heard me. When he pointed it out, I almost replied with, "S***! i just swore! But I caught myself.

So please help me and yell at me when I swear for the next month.

Just switched ...

2006-11-19T19:10:00.000-08:00

So I just switched to the beta version of blogger. I hope it doesn't screw up my blog too much.

I haven't had much to blog about lately. I guess I'm getting use to living here and the novelty is wearing off a little. Does that mean I'll experience some culture shock when I return to the big city? I'll have to retrain myself to function. For example, I'll have to look both ways before I cross the street. And I'll actually have a sidewalk to walk on!

Well, this is my last week of Health and Career education with this group of students. I've learned a lot from them. One, it's not so bad teaching them about STIs (the new term fro STDs, it stands for sexually transmitted infections). We laughed together, we were grossed out together. It was great.

Crabs. Eww!

Two, I will be a lot meaner with the second group. I'll let my rules be known right off the bat. I will start being tough when the students start talking over one another. I will make any gleekers or desk writer wash off desktops after school.

In other news, I can't believe it's almost Christmas. This time next week, it will be less than a month. I've already put up my lights. I'll post a picture of them when I get my camera. I'm so excited about returning home and to the big city. I can't wait to see my friends and family ... and a shopping mall! I expect lots of hugs because the last hug I received was in August.

Shot

2006-11-17T18:04:00.000-08:00

This week I kept getting poked with needles!

The first one was a test for TB. This is where you get a protein injected in your arm. It cause a slight bubble under your skin. The bubble disappears. The immunizers come back a few days later to check to see if you have a bump. If you do, you may be carrying TB. Fortunately, I'm not.

The entire school got tested for TB. This makes sense because there is a history in Canada of whole native villages getting wiped out by TB. But that was before penicillin ...

My next needle was for a flu shot. I've never gotten one of those before. But I thought, what the heck. It was free and it was happening in the school. I haven't had the flu in years but as a teacher you get exposed to these things all the time. And I don't know about you, but I hate barfing. Hence, why I hate getting the flu. Hence, why I got the flu shot.

The one that hurt the most was the flu shot. My arm still hurts. Ouch!

Let it ...

2006-11-15T07:11:00.000-08:00

I woke up at 6 this morning to go for my morning Jog...

... And it was fucking snowing! And not that wuss stuff it would do in my hometown. It was sticking. And there is now like 2 inches of snow on the ground.

I love the snow though. It's so pretty. It's just way to early to snow.

My jog was lovely though :)

Food Yearnings

2006-11-14T17:38:00.000-08:00

I love ice cream. Not too much a secret. But the only ice cream I can buy here is Nestle's Chocolate, vanilla or neopolitan. But dammit, I want some gourmet ice cream. I could really go for some Ben and Jerry's.

Ohhhh, yeah!

Mmmm, half baked. I can almost taste it now. I can feel it melting on my tongue as the morsels of cookie dough separate to give my taste buds pleasure. Oh God, I want some soo bad.

And its not like I can just get someone to ship some to me either. It will melt. This will definitely be something I buy when I go back home at Christmas.

Update

2006-11-12T19:19:00.000-08:00

Just a few notes.

One, I start teaching my Health and Career Education class about STIs this week. I've been doing some research. I was thinking I'd try some shock tactics by showing them some pictures of genital warts and chlamidia. But the pictures were so gross they almost discouraged me from ever having sex again.

There was a second totem pole raising this weekend. It unbelievable that there were two pole raising in one year. I've truly witnessed history here. This one was a two day celebration. I didn't attend most of the first day, but I did a lot for the second day. I even got picked on, with some other teachers, when the dance hosts were joking about finding a potlatch wife.

I got my Christmas light delivered this week. I ordered enough to decorate the inside of my place, the outside and my classroom. I can't wait!

Art

2006-11-10T14:28:00.000-08:00

I got an email from Brilliant this week that said he went to the Emily Carr exhibit at the art gallery this week. He saw lots of native art and commented that I would have liked it.

That comment got me thinking about art. I enjoy art. But not as much as I think some people think I do.

When I was a little kid, I liked art class in school, probably just like every kid. I also displayed most of my projects on my bedroom walls. My bedroom was actually something to see when I was little. I shared a room with my sister. On her side of the room, she had New Kids on the Block posters practically wallpaper the walls and the ceiling. I had my childhood art.

My mom encouraged me to do my art. I even took an art class outside of school. Art was a part of my mom's social life. Quite a few of her friends were local artist and I remember going to lots of art shows as a child. I think my mom thought I would be an artist when I grew up.

I took art in high school. The teacher was really nice but the clas was too structured for me and too into realism. I didn't do so hot in that class.

I still like seeing art but I am not a conniseur, by any means. When the Group of Seven collection came to my hometown, I went to see it. I saw some nice things, but I mainly went to say I went. There was really only one piece I liked, and I don't remember it. I don't have much art in my house. I just have a poster Asshole framed for me and some family photos. I have a little more art in my classroom - I have a neat picture that Asshole did (one of the things I didn't destroy after the recent drama) and one that a student drew for me.

I have done some recent art. It's on various people's Bebo pages. My best piece must be of Andrew (a TA at the school) guarding some puke. It is truly a masterpiece.

I hate teaching ...

2006-11-07T18:30:00.000-08:00

I hate teaching health and career education. It sucks. I'm already counting down the weeks. I have exactly 20 weeks and 2 days of teaching that class left (the last 6 weeks of the year I am career and health education free) ... and some of those weeks are 4 day weeks, like next week.

Why do I hate teaching this class? Because I like teaching math. I knew I was a teaching snob because I wouldn't even apply for substituting jobs. But I'm definitely a math specialist. I just pray that I can get out of teaching this class next year.

I think the kids know deep down that I disliking teaching the class. I like the kids, don't get me wrong. And I try to be enthusiastic, but teaching them to be worksafe is only so stimulating.

But grade 8s are nuts! They are truly peanuts ... or perhaps cashews. I'm not too sure. They are always so passively hyper. How is that combination possible? I'm not sure. But it is. You should see it in action.

I actually almost dread the class. I love my math classes so much that this class is just a hump I need to get over everyday (right before lunch). Sometimes it is a huge hump. It's bigger that my step niece's pregnant stomach!

In other news, Dad finally shipped all my stuff up here today. Yes! I should get it next week. I'll finally get my vacuum and microwave back! And my exercise tapes!

My cable got cut today. I'll actually have to go to the Band Office and pay for it. Darn, no more free cable. I know I need the cable too. I'm going nuts that I can't watch TV. I'm super addicted.

I came across some photos ...

2006-11-05T13:37:00.000-08:00

I was on a website where a lot of the staff at the school post pictures. I stole two to share with you.

This first photo is from a promise. Some of the staff promised to do some dares if the kids raised money for the Terry Fox run. Three staffers said they'd get taped up to a wall if the kids raise at least $1500. The kids did and here's what happened. It was too funny. I'm in this photo in the green blazer in the background around the middle of the photo.

The second photo is the staff photo from the school. I wish I were smiling more. Oh well.

I like weekend mornings

2006-11-04T09:50:00.000-08:00

I like waking up on the weekends. I wake up on my own. Most weekend mornings I lie in bed and think. The last few weekend mornings, I've fantisized about how great it will be when I come home for Christmas. That's a hint for all of you that you better make it great for me :)

I get up and make breakfast next. I like to eat it in my pajamas. On weekdays I shower first so I eat breakfast in my school clothes.

Today I made pancakes. You know what is really good in pancake batter? Caramilk bars. I had some left-over halloween candy.

I usually spend several hours at school catching up on work and getting ready for the next week. But it sure is nice to not have to wake up at 6 and be at school around 8.

I'm short

2006-11-03T21:45:00.000-08:00

I've finally come to the realization I'm short. I've suspected it for a while but now I know I am. I didn't really think I was until last year.

I thought I was at least average height before because I'm both taller than my mom and older sister.

I've always known I was shorter than, say, the guys I've dated. The shortest guy I've dated was 5' 11.75". But that just makes me cute. I'd have to stand on a stair to be eye level without standing on my tip toes. It has caused me to get better neck muscles from the strain, but I've coped.

But I've found out I was short last year when all my student teacher friends were taller than me (well, except Sachiko). Ok, maybe I was just hanging out with those weird mutant tall student teacher types. No such luck. It finally hit me that I was short when I was standing around with my grade 8s and the boys were towering over me (this of course happened near the end of the year when most of them had gone through a growth spurt).

Yesterday was also a realization I was short. I was adjusting my thermostat and I realized that I couldn't actually see what I was doing. That was strange. Everytime I've done this, I have been able to see. Did I shrink? No, it turns out I constantly walk on my tip toes. My mom points out I walk on my tip toes, but I didn't realize I do it ALL the time. I do, it turns out. I think this has kept in me in constant denial that I'm not short. But now, I'm out of the closet. I am short people, and I am proud about it ... because it makes me cuter :)

It should really be no surprise to me. All the pants I've bought in the last two years drag on the ground. I've never really paid attention to this until I realized my beautiful,hot, sexy, new Seven jeans were dragging in the mud. And then I was thinking about my other pants and how either the bottoms of them are ripped or I've pinned them up.

My profession has also not helped. I'm constantly around people who are sitting, or else I'm sitting. All through out university I sat in a desk, at a table, on a bar stool etc. And now, my students are sitting while I'm standing up. At this vantage point I'm elevated even over the most vertically gifted students. Or else, I'm sitting at my desk when they approach me.

I was hoping to have a picture of this with me new Webcam, but the thing is not compatible with my computer. Now I have to send it back and I'm still camera-less. Sigh.

Gleeking

2006-11-02T20:18:00.000-08:00

I finally sent a kid to the office today. I hate doing that. I want the kids to stay in class because I want them to learn. And they certainly can't learn what I'm trying to teach when they're in the office.

I sent the kid to the office because he keeps gleeking one everyone and everything. In case you forget what gleeking is, it's when someone flicks their tongue so that little droplets of spit land everywhere.

This kid has been doing this for two weeks now and I got fed up. Other kids in the class have now learned to do this to get this kid back for gleeking on them. I tried ignoring it. That didn't work. I tried the that's-really-gross-because-you-are- spiting-on-people. It didn't stop. I tried the that's-how-people-can-get-sick-from- germs strategy. I got sick. Coincidence? Maybe.

Finally, I got sick and tired of the gleeking wars. I reminded the kids that it was gross and I wouldn't tolerate it anymore.

The straw that did it was the umpteenth time a kid yelled, as she was wiping spit off her cheek "Ahh, Ms. Small Town, William gleeked on me."

"Ok, William. I've mentioned time and time again that gleeking is gross and spreads germs. We've discussed in class twice now how you don't like to be gleeked on and that if you don't like it, others probably don't like it either. I warned you several times now that I will not tolerate it. And now you are coming with me to the office."

William promised to stop. Too bad. I have to follow through with my threat. We went to the office and I found the principal there. I politely told her what was going on and if she would talk to William about gleeking.

William came back to class about 15 minutes later. He has did not gleek in that class. I have the honor of teaching two classes to William. He did not gleek in our second class together either.

After all is said, I still can't gleek on command. I've tried.

The end of an era

2006-11-01T16:40:00.001-08:00

I just read that Bob Barker will be retiring from the Price is Right in June 2007.

Holy Crap!

Staying home sick will never be the same.

Help control the pet population: have your pet spayed or neutered.

Happy Halloween!

2006-10-31T16:50:00.000-08:00

Halloween is a BIG deal here. All the kids dress up and go trick-or-treating ... even the teenagers.

I'm all set for the kids in costumes. I have 50 mini-chocolate bars: Caramilk, Coffee Crisp, and Crispy Crunch.

I'm also set for the kids without costumes. They get squirt with the squirt gun.

I'd take pictures, but my webcam still hasn't arrived in the mail. If you don't get things sent Expresspost here, you'll never get it. Well, not never, but it will take about a month. That sucks.

My literacy class also carved a pumpkin which I got to keep. It's Scooby-doo dressed as a witch. Pretty complicated for a pumpkin, eh? I'd take a picture ... actually I found one on the internet.

Screech-A-Ros

2006-10-29T12:55:00.000-08:00

Ok, that's what they were called in my day. A brand name of them calls then Screech Owls. They're this stupid fire cracker.. but oh wait, fire crackers are illegal in this country, excuse me, fire work ... that is really loud and screams for like 10 seconds. Reeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwww!

I hate these fucking things! The person who invented them should be forced to listen to one go off ever 10 seconds for the rest of their existence in purgatory. Last night I was feeling crappy so I went to be early. I lied in bed for an hour because about ever 30 seconds someone would set one of these things off.

I don't know what the preoccupation these things are. My brother LOVED them when he was a kid (he still probably does). They make a really annoying noise. People also hit the end with a hammer and duct tape them to make them just BANG really loud. I walked through the school today on my way to the store, and these things were littering the ground ... along with burnt bottles all over the place.

I just don't get them. I get Roman candles - they make pretty lights. I get most fireworks because I have that caveman instinct sometime too. I'm drawn to shiny objects, especially ones related to fire. But my instinct tell me that when I hear something that makes the god awful noise of a screech-a-ro, I should run, far, far away from it.

But I guess this just proves again, that I am not a teenage boy.

Pedophile Hilton

2006-10-29T09:44:00.000-08:00

I got up this morning ... sick again! Fuck, I hate being sick. The worse part is the sore throat. I usually buy a big bag or sugarless candy to suck on to soothe it. But I can't here. They don't sell sugarless candy. So now I'll be sick and on a sugar high.

I turned on the TV, to the music video channel and Paris Hilton's new video was on.

Just another reason for me to dislike her antics. Here she is dressed like a sexy teacher, seducing a young boy! Great, now Paris is a pedophile. How old does that guy look? I think he can't be older than 14 (yet you hear him talk in the video and his voice had changed). I kept watching the video (insert car accident analogy here) and I got confused. Is she a teacher or a student? You see her singing in the cafeteria and then you see her dressed like teacher with a whip. And then at the end the boy asks her "something" and you see them enter the cafeteria together.

Either way, teacher or student (though she's way too old to pass for a high school student), seducing that boy must be highly illegal. And quite sick. Way to reach new heights Paris!

Pole raising

2006-10-27T23:18:00.000-07:00

It all started a few days ago. It was during math 10 that I heard the announcement. The principal was doing the morning announcements and mentioned that on Thurdays, the entire school would be going over to the pole carver's house instead of afternoon classes to attend the pole raising ceremony. I got pretty excited. Then the principal reminded the students that they should bring their regalia to school to wear for the ceremony. I was ecstatic. Then she mentioned that there will be a feast following the ceremony, followed by dancing.

The principal finished the announcements and I couldn't hold back my excitement. I started shooting questions to the students. My first was about the regalia. I'm familiar with the term because I've worn some since I've graduated from both high school and university. But I was curious what exactly it was. The students told me it's usually a blanket worn as a cape with a skirt for girls, and a vest or tunic for boys. The chiefs wear headresses too. I was totally excited.

I started gushing about the feast and dancing too. I asked the students what kind of dancing. They replied traditional, of course. I was beside myself. I was so excited to attend! The students were looking at me like I was a bit crazy at first, but the were all grinning from ear to ear at my enthusiasm. I could see the pride in their eyes when I just started gushing about how cool this would be.

It's been absolutely dumping rain here for the last couple of days but for some reason (which I think is beyond coincident) it stopped raining for the ceremony. The announcement was made for us all to head over to the pole carver's house, where each teacher would lead their literacy class.

Directions in this town are all told by where people live. Example: I wanted to go to the video store last week. I was told it was Jaimie's Uncle Charlie's house. Ok, where is that? It's on the south end of town. Ok, how do I get there? Ok you go down to the general store, then hang a left. Head down the street past Martha Joes' house. Once you see Ken Moon's house, you're only two houses away. If you hit Linda Red's house you've gone too far. Hmm, too bad I only know where the teacher's live and like 5 community members. I will learn.

Anyway, needless to say the class lead me to the pole carver's house. Almost the entire community was there. The ceremony started when the chiefs arrived ... fashionably late of course. First, some grade eleven and twelve students carried the totem pole out of the carver's garage and put the totem on some crates in the road. There were some words and then the chiefs blessed the totem by sprinkling eagle down on the pole and by tapping it with birch boughs. All the time while the singers sang and played drums.

The boys carry the pole. Two of them are my students, Eric and Brian.

Once that was done, the boys picked the pole back up and we all headed over to the Elder's Hall to erect the totem. Once there, there were more words said in both English and the native language here. The chiefs did a little dance, and then the boys pulled the pole into place. It was then screwed into place with a trusty Black & Decker electric drill.

The chiefs right before the totem went up

The totem going up

A couple hours later, the community went to The Hall for the feast and dancing. First, all the community members sat down. Members with distinction sat at the front of the hall. I sat in the bleachers with some other teachers. Next, the family of the pole carver entered and sat at the front. Finally, the chiefs came from behind a curtain in the front, and did the Chiefs Dance to welcome everyone. This dance is way cool. All the chiefs are elders and man, can these guys dance up a storm. If you just saw these guys in the village, you'd never know they could move like that! After that, some community members came out carring pictures of family members (two happened to be students of mine) that are no longer with us, who passed away over the last few years. The families of these people were blessed and told that we are all thinking of these members and wished they were with us today.

The Chiefs Dance (I'm in the background of this shot, in the top, left corner)

Next, some of the women got up and did the Ladies Dance. This dance was done around the feast food as a blessing to the food. After that, we all said a prayer (said by the United Church's female pastor). Then we all lined up to eat. The food was amazing. There were like 6 or 7 types of salmon, 3 or 4 types of halibut, deer meat, 4 or 5 types of potatoes, 3 or 4 types of pasta salad, rice and some specialty foods.

The specialty foods include herring roe. This one was prepared by deep frying it and then putting it in a vinegar, soy sauce type sauce. People love this stuff! Everyone couldn't get enough. I tried it. It's really not tasty to me ... at all. But more for everyone else, right? Another dish is a fish eggs and seaweed soup type thing. Again, I tried some off someone else's plate. Not tasty.

The most coveted food item is this stuff called grease. It's a fine delicacy that is very expensive and takes a special hand to make. People love it as a topping for rice, potatoes and fish. I heard it also cures any ailment you have. Let me tell you how it's made. Some sort of fish is left to ferment and rot in a special container. Then once it's nice and rancid, the rotten fat is scraped off the top and mixed with something else (I forget what it is). This is grease. Needless to say, I saved this for everyone else to enjoy.

My student, Eric (in the middle). He is so proud of his culture. He is a singer. He's one of the nicest students I've ever met. He will be a great man one day.

After dinner, I got one of my students to sit next to me to tell me all about what was going on. Thanks Mackenzie! There were a couple of speaches made and then gifts were brought out for the chiefs and the pole carver and then other people who helped with the whole ceremony. People who were key to the event got special vests (normal western ones) in rememberance of the day. They did a dance around the hall to show them off. Next was the money tree ceremony. A blanket was put up over an easel and community members were invited to pin up money to the pole carver for his generous contribution to the community. At quick glance, I saw about $1000 up there. I found out later that the family of the pole carver paid for the entire day, including all the gifts to everyone. They also arranged for all the food to be brought (which is through asking certain people to cook certain foods).

After the money three, the dancing started. Most of the dances are performed by the children and young people of the community. The dances were great. I really enjoyed watching them. The music of all the dances, by the way, is provided by the singers. Most of the singers are men and there is about a dozen or so of them. They sang traditions songs as well as current songs written by people of his territory. I was so proud to see some of my students dancing and two of them were even singers. Half way through the dancing, the kids were all given gifts of community bags with toys and cool little school supplies in them.

The last dance is called Celebration. Here, the singers go to the middle of the hall. This is danced by the dancers and who ever is invited. Mackenzie invited me to dance. She said she hadn't wanted to dance in the last three years but she wanted to dance this one. So we all went behind the curtain. I asked her what the moves are. She said you just swing your hands back and forth and then when the singers say "wooha" you bend to the right, left, front, then back. I had so much fun dancing. I got really into. The second part of the dance was even more fun. I saw one woman dancing with more rhythm so I followed her moves. By this time I had several of my students dancing around me. They thought it was great that I was really getting into the dancing. We were all laughing and having a great time.

I had an awesome time for the entire ceremony. I learned so much about the culture here. I can't wait for the next community event. I hear it's going to be a potlatch next month.

Today at school, one of my fellow teachers was telling me about how the students were talking about me dancing. They thought it was great fun to see me up there getting into it. Mackenzie even told Ms. So-and-So how cool it was and she was gushing about how I was having such a good time.

Totem raising

2006-10-26T21:44:00.000-07:00

I just went to one of the coolest ceremonies I've ever been to in my life. A totem was raised today in front of the elders building. It was a neat ceremony. A lot of the kids were dressed in their regalia. I'll write more about it tomorrow since I'm really exhausted. After the totem raising, there was a community feast. All you fish lovers would have been in heaven at the spread that was offered. The food was so good. And then there was dancing. My favorite dance was the clam dance, the dance by the girls.
I had an incredible night. I'm one lucky teacher!

The Secret ...

2006-10-24T17:39:00.000-07:00

I found out the secret of how your student will think you're an awesome teacher. Here it is.

Teach badly for a month ... well bad according to the students. Assign them homework every night for the sake of assigning it. Speed through the material so they don't understand and then spend a whole week and a half reviewing and reteaching them what you tried to teach them the first time. By now they should be nice and frustrated.

The next step is to have a class meeting and ask them what they want from you. They will suggest that you do the job properly. That you assign homework after you've done lots of examples, give them time to copy things down from the board, and give them lots of class time to work on their work so they leave the classroom confident that they can do their homework. During class, ask the students lots of questions.

The kicker is to point out to them that you are actually incorporating what they suggested to you. Then, let the compliments fly.

"Ms. Small Town, all teachers should be like you. You actually listen to what we have to say."

"Well students, this is not just my math class, this is our math class."

"Ms. Small Town, you are an awesome teacher!"

"Yeah, Ms. Small Town for president"

"If all teachers were like you, I'd actually like coming to school."

These are actually quotes from the students today. I'm in teaching heaven. It almost makes up from my Health and Career Ed class.

Fart

2006-10-23T17:05:00.000-07:00

I've forgotten what it is like to be around grade 8 boys. It's been so long since I have. I forgot one of the biggest deals in an eighth grader's world is farting. I've taught grade 8s now for a week and a day and I've had two farting mishaps.

The first one was while I was talking. A girl started screaming bloody murder in the middle of my sentence. I looked at her worried. "Ahhhh! Rennel just farted!!!" This caused all the kids within a two desk radius to clear away from Rennel. I just looked at the fart screamer, raised my eyebrow and kept going.

The second mishap happened today. We were all standing at the door waiting for the bell to ring. One girl wanted something at my desk which is on the other side of the classroom from the door. When I returned to the door, half the students had their shirts pulled over their nose. I looked at them and Rennel creaped out of his shirt to inform me that William farted. I couldn't smell anything. It's funny, none of the kids scattered away from William though. I guess it's because the alternative was being away from the door and god forbid the students not be out of the classroom by the time the bell stops ringing.

Not that adult don't have to deal with farting. But we have different issues. We don't fart in front of each other for attention or amusement. Well, usually we don't (but we all enjoy a good fart joke every once in a while).

I find the biggest fart dilemma in an adult's life is the farting in front of the girlfriend/boyfriend issue. No one ever wants to be the first to fart in front of their current flame. My rule is that I never do until he's farted at least three times in front of me when we both know he's done it. It's hard to not fart in front of a guy you're sleeping with for a while. I find I have to find ways to leave the room, or else hold it in until it implodes in my stomach. I only farted once in front of Brilliant, by the way. But I'm pretty sure he was asleep. I can't say the same for him to me though ;)

Family Spew

2006-10-22T16:47:00.000-07:00

I usually watch Family Feud on my lunchbreak from school because noting compliments a sandwich like the Feud.

A couple of things have changed since the last time I was into it. One, what happened to Richard Karn?

I loved him as host. He would always say totally inappropriate things and make a lot of sexual innuendos. Hmm, maybe I've answered my own question.

Two, is it just me or are family's getting more stupid? People give really bad answers. And the ironic things is that the more moronic the answer is, the more one's family claps and shouts, "GOOD ANSWER, GOOD ANSWER." Example, someone answered " a goat" when the question was, "What does a man look like he swallowed when he has a big gut." I got mad at the TV for this question for another reason. My first answer to this question was a watermelon. The family didn't guess this ... neither did the other family for "the steal" Watermelon was the number one answer by the way. The family guessed "a ball" and the answer on the board was "A big ball". Ok. Two family members later, she asks, "Is a basketball considered a big ball?" D'UH! No, a basketball is small ball, you dumb shit.

This show makes me yell at the TV a lot. I yell at the TV, "BAD ANSWER, BAD ANSWER" all the time. I'm the bomb at this game. Maybe that's why I yell so much. I'm really good at fast money too. I could easily win the 20 grand for my family.

My dream Family Feud team would be my brother (because he's good at this shit), my mom (because she's generally smart), Brilliant (with a name like that, who could not want him on their team ... even though he's not family), and Hot Rugged Soccer Goalie (not only smart but is witty all while keeping a straight face ... but also not family).

GPS Heaven

2006-10-21T20:37:00.000-07:00

My co-worker (and vice principal) just bought a GPS of the same name brand of mine. He doesn’t know how to work it very well. I do. So we exchanged favors. I showed him a few things on it and he loaded my memory card with a map of this area. I was stoked! I got the better deal. So now my GPS has all the inlets, islands, roads and ferry routes on it for this area. I’m in nerd heaven!

Something a little funny happened. It looked like it came straight out of a sitcom. He was recovering from a hangover. A teaching couple up here invites the teachers to their house every Friday for drinks and relaxation. When I showed up last night around 9:30, half the people were already pretty drunk, including my GPS buddy.

At one point today as we were loading my GPS chip, I was passing it to him and he dropped it in his lap. Me being courteous, I almost went to get it for him. Then I remembered it’s not a good idea to retrieve things from men’s laps unless you are making a statement. I think he saw me almost reach for it. That was a little embarrassing. Anyway, he picked up the chip, only to drop it on the floor. He went to pick it up and as he was coming back up, he cracked his head on his desk. Ok, not funny haha because it look liked it hurt, but funny ironic because I’m sure it didn’t help his hangover.

I Hate my Ex

2006-10-20T20:19:00.000-07:00

Asshole is such an ... Asshole. I’m so sick of his shit. I borrowed $200 dollars from him last fall because I was dead broke. I also borrowed $600 from my sister. I paid her back right way though. I was living very thrifty, not buying clothes, CDs, alcohol nor take-out food. But student loans just don’t seem to cover living in res, tuition, next semester deposits, and basic food.

Anyway, I borrowed it after he broke up with me. He said when we broke up if I ever needed anything I could ask him. I thought eating was a big enough emergency. At first he was reluctant. Then he offered to “lend” me the money for sexual favors, which is retarded because he got those for free when we went out. I told him I rather starve because I’m not a prostitute. Well, d’uh, you break my heart into a million pieces and you still want intimacy, fuck you! Anyway, after I cried my eyes out and threatened to tell his sister of his offer, he lent me the money. I told him I’d pay him back as soon as possible. That was this fall. I contemplated not paying it back because he’s an idiot (for lending it to me?). But I don’t like owing people anything I’m not willing to owe. I mailed him a cheque and I thought that was almost the end of my interactions with him (he parent’s are graciously keeping some of my stuff in their basement which I want to get out very soon). Well, it wasn't.

This summer he moved in with a friend of mine. They were just roommates. It turns out things have changed in his life. I’ve heard both sides of the story and both of them are omitting details. Here are the facts.
• Asshole got fired from his job. He says it’s wrongful termination. Whatever.
• He hates his roommate’s boyfriend. He actually has a restraining order on him. I have no idea what that’s about. I have a theory though.
• He up and left the roommate one morning. He didn’t give notice and he’s not paying next months rent. He says its because she parties too much and the whole restraining order thing. But that’s illegal according to the Residential Tenancy Act.

I actually felt sorry for the guy. I think he’s pathetic. I also though he may need a friend, so I contacted him. As much as I disliked him, I didn’t want him to do anything drastic to himself. I’ve seen how depressed he can get.

What was I thinking? He started harassing me about the money. I was in shock. I sent him a cheque over a month ago and my bank records show that cheque went through. The insults were flying. I don’t think I’ve ever been so angry in my life. Needless to say, I now have had to contact my bank and get detailed records and file a potential fraud complaint since Asshole insists he hasn’t gotten it. I hope to God he is not lying to me or this guy is seriously fucked.

I just can’t wait to get rid of this guy in my life. I just want the drama to end. I’m moving on with my life and I want to leave him far behind. I usually don’t just purge people out of my life, but I am here. I can’t believe I actually loved this guy enough to want to spend the rest of my life with him. All I can say is that him breaking up with me was one of the best things to happen to me.

My wish for this posting is that I don’t want comments from my mom or sister. I know what you are going to say and I don’t need to hear it now. I also don’t want anyone I know to be rude to Asshole if they see him in town. He is not worth the effort. I’m also scared he may sabotage the stuff I have in his parent’s basement so I’m not doing anything but be cooperative. My biggest revenge when I get my stuff back is never talk to him again. He’s not worth the effort of being mad at him or getting anyone to do or say anything to/about him. He’s already taken so much of my time. He deserves no more.

America's Stupidest Videos

2006-10-19T17:33:00.000-07:00

I'm so tired this week. But I've had some big lessons too. But I'll write about those later.

I get this channel where they seem to have America's Funniest Videos on all the time. I watched an episode of it.

I think this show is stupid as fuck. Most of it's not funny. It's stupid. It's been on for years, I would even guess something around 20 years. I remember when it was hosted by Bob Saget. It's the same stupid videos over and over again. Literally. I've seen some of the exact videos that I saw when I was a kid. Someone gets hit in the nards, some baby does some cute thing, and some pet falls off of something.

Most of the videos look like they really hurt too. I don't want to see some guy hit his head really hard when he runs into a pole. I don't want to see some kid who broke his foot by putting it between the springs of a trampoline.

Does anyone agree with me? Let me know.

Bomb

2006-10-17T17:23:00.000-07:00

I have some funny, funny students. My literacy class needed two classes to finish one lesson because yesterday they were on hyper pills. So today, I made over half the class finish the assignment while the "good" ones got to do a word search. When everyone was done, we marked the assignment and then we had ten minutes left. I like to fill that with a game. My two favorite games for smallish classes are Dart Bingo and hangman. The class decided on hangman.

The rules are that I start, and whoever guesses mine gets to do the next word or phrase. My only rule about words and phrases is that they can't be swear words or be rude. One kids guessed my clue with just the vowels (it was Employee of the Month by the way). He forfeited his turn to another kid, Harley, who happens to have a wicked sense of humor. He umms and ahhs until he writes the following spaces:

__ __ __ __

The class and I guess tons of letters: e, i, t, s, r, d, l, u, y, z, x, n, and c. Harley is forced to draw crazy body parts on the hangman like eyes, hair and hands. We are starting to wonder what the word is. I guess B. We get the following letters.

B __ __ B

The class erupts in laughter ... including me. We all just laugh our asses off. But the students are NOT guessing what we are all thinking. I can tell Harley has something up his sleeve. I can also tell the class is waiting for a reaction out of me. Will I get mad? Will I say what we are thinking?

I look at it one more time, while the class is pretty quiet to see my reaction. I guess one more letter: the letter M.

Harley adds the following letter:

B __ M B

Someone in the class screams BOMB! And we all laughed. Harley breaks the ice by saying, "You all thought it was boob, didn't you?" We all laugh again.

I don't know, I thought it was funny.

I'm going fucking ape shit

2006-10-16T20:43:00.000-07:00

My MSN is not working again. I get really pissed when it doesn't work. So I'm in a crappy mood.

I don't have much time either. I went to a Settlement Meeting at the hall tonight. What that is is basically a soup night memorial ... that lasts 3 hours. I have some mega planning to do.

But I did get my CDs. Cool! And my teacher certification certificate. Now I can teach for real.

Writer's block

2006-10-15T11:04:00.000-07:00

I have blog block already, and I've barely written 50 posts. Usually my weekday posts are about school and then I come up with something profound to say over the weekend.

I was playing with the idea of posting about how men love it when women cook, but then I couldn't really defend it properly nor put a wicked spin on it.

Then I was going to post about how I'm in age limbo because I'm in that stage up here where I'm either too young or too old. I feel like an eleven year old sometimes - too young to be a teenager, too old to be a little kid. But that's the only comment I had there.

I think I'm just distracted. One is from my preoccupation with school and planning and boring, complicated things about how the hell I'm going to teach Health and Career Education (which includes a section on sex ed and drug abuse).

I'm also distracted by my Christmas plans ... already. I'm wondering about Christmas shopping (which will either be online or not at all. I hope my family likes money in envelopes). I'm thinking about my annual Christmas card and coming up with the perfect image. I'm deciding about how I'm getting home, either by ferry or flight. I'm thinking about going to the big city and who I'm going to stay with while there and how long I'll stay and wondering if I'll see all my teacher and res friends.

I'm distracted by waiting for all my packages to arrive. I have two coming from home: 1 has contact lenses, the other is a mystery package. I have one coming from Amazon with 4 CDs. I have one coming from London Drugs with a webcam. I have one coming from Sears with bras, underwear and a winter coat. I have one coming from Brilliant with pink pencils. I have one coming from Robin with new clothes. And then I'm still waiting for all my stuff from Dad to be shipped.

Ok, now that I've written about every little thing in my brain, maybe my next post will be profound. Maybe it's time I do another Ode to someone.